NPR 09-10:The Person I Want to Bring into This World一个即将降临的生

Social worker Laura Shipler Chico is about to have her first baby. In naming the traits she and her husband hope the child will posses, she believes she will discover the things she values the most.

I believe in mystery.
I believe in family.
I believe in being who I am.
I believe in the power of failure.
And I believe normal life is extraordinary.
This I Believe.

Today for our series This I Believe, we have an essay sent to us by listener Laura Shipler Chico. Chico is a social worker. She specializes in trauma¹ recovery. And later this week, she is expecting to become a new mother. Here's our series curator, independent producer Jay Allison.

Until recently Laura Shipler Chico and her husband lived and worked in Rwanda, bringing together genocide survivors² and perpetrators for the reconciliation³ process. She said that experience informed her beliefs, not in a broadly humanitarian⁴ context, but in her specific hopes for her baby. Here's Laura Shipler Chico with her essay for This I Believe.

I am pregnant. In the brief moments between dramatic dashes to the bathroom and just as dramatic raids of the refrigerator. I sometimes sit and philosophize about what kind of person I would like to bring into this world.

"If we had to boil it down to three basic personality traits," I asked my husband, "what would they be?"

I thought if I could name those three qualities, I could identify my own belief about what I value most. Just three, because I figured we'd be lucky to even get those, given our limited control over whoever pops out.

"Honesty," he said, without hesitating. That was first on my list, too. I believe when you're honest, you're less likely to end up in jail. And when you're honest, you're willing to take the harder path sometimes, and so you're always pushing yourself to grow. When you're honest, people trust you, and so soon you start to trust yourself. And when you can really trust yourself — I believe that that is the foundation for all the rest.

After a pause, I said, "Caring about other people." Mean honesty all on its own can be a bit harsh, but when an honest person cares about other people, that's a powerful combination. When you care about other people, you're hopefully not as likely to land in jail, and more likely to become a responsible world citizen. You're less likely to be mean and more likely to have deep friendships. And when you care about other people, they tend to care about you, and pretty soon you start to care about you, too. Oh, and I almost forgot: When you care about other people, you are more likely to know how to really love, and how to be loved back.

Now, for the third: This was harder. This was when we started to get greedy, as though having a baby at all, and then having a healthy baby, and then having a healthy baby that grew up into an honest, caring person wasn't enough. A long list of qualities vied for our vote: industrious⁵, adventurous⁶, creative, smart, kind, playful, and so on. But most of the qualities could still be traced back to our first two or, if not, they seemed less fundamental somehow.

And then I remembered what my grandmother taught my father and my father taught me: "You should always be able to laugh at yourself." I believe if you can laugh at yourself, it probably means you like yourself, deep down inside, and you know that you're no better and you are no worse than anybody else. You'll probably have fun in life. And most importantly, you're more likely to forgive yourself when you're not always honest and you're not always caring.

And finally, we thought, even if you do land in jail, at least you can laugh at your own stupidity for getting caught.

Laura Shipler Chico with her essay for This I Believe. Chico told us that the most resilient children she worked with in Rwanda embody⁷ the three qualities she hopes for in her own child. She and her husband are now living in London, and are expecting their baby the day after tomorrow.

We hope you will consider writing an essay for our series at npr.org/thisibelieve. You can find out more and see all the other essays that have been submitted. For This I Believe, I'm Jay Allison.

Next Sunday, on weekend edition, a This I Believe essay from listener Robin⁸ Baudier in New Orleans on her belief in strange blessings⁹ and the lessons taught by hurricane Katrina.

Support for This I Believe comes from Prudential Retirement¹⁰.

1 trauma   

n.外伤，精神创伤

参考例句：

• Counselling is helping him work through this trauma.心理辅导正帮助他面对痛苦。
• The phobia may have its root in a childhood trauma.恐惧症可能源于童年时期的创伤。

2 survivors   

幸存者，残存者，生还者( survivor的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• The survivors were adrift in a lifeboat for six days. 幸存者在救生艇上漂流了六天。
• survivors clinging to a raft 紧紧抓住救生筏的幸存者

3 reconciliation   

n.和解，和谐，一致

参考例句：

• He was taken up with the reconciliation of husband and wife.他忙于做夫妻间的调解工作。
• Their handshake appeared to be a gesture of reconciliation.他们的握手似乎是和解的表示。

4 humanitarian   

n.人道主义者，博爱者，基督凡人论者

参考例句：

• She has many humanitarian interests and contributes a lot to them.她拥有很多慈善事业，并作了很大的贡献。
• The British government has now suspended humanitarian aid to the area.英国政府现已暂停对这一地区的人道主义援助。

5 industrious   

adj.勤劳的，刻苦的，奋发的

参考例句：

• If the tiller is industrious,the farmland is productive.人勤地不懒。
• She was an industrious and willing worker.她是个勤劳肯干的员工。

6 adventurous   

adj.爱冒险的；惊心动魄的，惊险的，刺激的　

参考例句：

• I was filled with envy at their adventurous lifestyle.我很羨慕他们敢于冒险的生活方式。
• He was predestined to lead an adventurous life.他注定要过冒险的生活。

7 embody   

vt.具体表达，使具体化；包含，收录

参考例句：

• The latest locomotives embody many new features. 这些最新的机车具有许多新的特色。
• Hemingway's characters plainly embody his own values and view of life.海明威笔下的角色明确反映出他自己的价值观与人生观。

8 robin   

n.知更鸟，红襟鸟

参考例句：

• The robin is the messenger of spring.知更鸟是报春的使者。
• We knew spring was coming as we had seen a robin.我们看见了一只知更鸟，知道春天要到了。

9 blessings   

n.（上帝的）祝福( blessing的名词复数 )；好事；福分；因祸得福

参考例句：

• Afflictions are sometimes blessings in disguise. 塞翁失马，焉知非福。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• We don't rely on blessings from Heaven. 我们不靠老天保佑。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》

10 retirement   

n.退休，退职

参考例句：

• She wanted to enjoy her retirement without being beset by financial worries.她想享受退休生活而不必为金钱担忧。
• I have to put everything away for my retirement.我必须把一切都积蓄起来以便退休后用。