读者文摘:生活中的段子分享

When people hear that my husband and I just celebrated¹ our 60th wedding anniversary,

在人们得知我和丈夫刚刚庆祝了我们的结婚60周年纪念日后，

they inevitably² ask us the secret to our long, successful marriage.

他们免不了要问我们婚姻长久成功的秘密是什么。

In response, my husband will smile sweetly, nod my way, and explain, "We both love me."

作为回应，我的丈夫会亲切地笑着，朝我点点头，然后解释说：“我们两个都爱我。”

My friend took her teenage daughter to a new doctor for a checkup.

我朋友带她十几岁的女儿去一个新医生那里做检查，

The nurse asked the usual questions, including if she had an STD. "No," said the teen. "We have a Toyota."

护士问了常规的问题，包括问她是否有性传播疾病（雷诺的一款车型）。她女儿说：“没有，我们有一辆丰田。”

One day, my physician father treated himself to a plate of raw oysters³ and offered to share them with me.

有一天，身为医生的父亲搞了一盘生蚝，并且主动提出要和我分享。

Just as I was about to dig in, he picked up an oyster⁴, examined it, and commented, "They remind me of infected tonsils."

正当我要吃的时候，他拿起一个生蚝，检查了一番，说道：“它们让我想起了受感染的扁桃体。”

And that’s the story of how he ended up eating the entire plate of oysters himself.

这就是他如何自己吃完整盘生蚝的故事。

I accidentally threw away my four-year-old’s favorite candy wrapper. Please keep us both in your thoughts during this difficult time.

我不小心把我四岁孩子最喜欢的糖纸扔掉了。在这困难的时刻，请把我们都放在你的心里。

My 11-year-old takes his homework seriously. One question required him to write a sentence using the word version.

我11岁的儿子写作业很认真。其中一个问题要求他用“version”这个词写一个句子。

His sentence: "Have you heard of the version Mary?"

他造的句子是：“玛丽你听说过版本这个词吗？”

I held a garage sale with my little blond⁵ cairn terrier for company. Soon came the first customer.

我和我的金发凯恩狗进行了一次车库拍卖。很快，第一位顾客来了。

He took his time browsing⁶ and examining everything I had out for sale.

他不慌不忙地浏览和检查我出售的每一样东西。

Eventually he found something that interested him. "Excuse me," he said. "How much for the dog?"

最后他找到了令他感兴趣的东西。“打扰一下，”他说。“这只狗多少钱？”

After my 91-year-old mother finished having her hair cut and shaped, the stylist announced, "There, now you look ten years younger."

在我91岁的母亲剪好头发后，发型师对她说：“瞧，你现在看起来年轻了10岁。”

My mother, unimpressed, replied, "Who wants to look 81 years old?"

我的母亲无动于衷地回答说：“谁想看起来像81岁？”

1 celebrated   

adj.有名的，声誉卓著的

参考例句：

• He was soon one of the most celebrated young painters in England.不久他就成了英格兰最负盛名的年轻画家之一。
• The celebrated violinist was mobbed by the audience.观众团团围住了这位著名的小提琴演奏家。

2 inevitably   

adv.不可避免地；必然发生地

参考例句：

• In the way you go on,you are inevitably coming apart.照你们这样下去，毫无疑问是会散伙的。
• Technological changes will inevitably lead to unemployment.技术变革必然会导致失业。

3 oysters   

牡蛎( oyster的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• We don't have oysters tonight, but the crayfish are very good. 我们今晚没有牡蛎供应。但小龙虾是非常好。
• She carried a piping hot grill of oysters and bacon. 她端出一盘滚烫的烤牡蛎和咸肉。

4 oyster   

n.牡蛎；沉默寡言的人

参考例句：

• I enjoy eating oyster; it's really delicious.我喜欢吃牡蛎，它味道真美。
• I find I fairly like eating when he finally persuades me to taste the oyster.当他最后说服我尝尝牡蛎时，我发现我相当喜欢吃。

5 blond   

adj.金发的；n.白肤碧眼金发的人

参考例句：

• Her long blond hair spilled down over her shoulders.她那淡黄色的长发披垂在双肩。
• This blond man delivers newspaper every morning.这个白肤金发碧眼的男人每天早晨送报纸。

6 browsing   

v.吃草( browse的现在分词 )；随意翻阅；（在商店里）随便看看；（在计算机上）浏览信息

参考例句：

• He sits browsing over[through] a book. 他坐着翻阅书籍。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• Cattle is browsing in the field. 牛正在田里吃草。 来自《简明英汉词典》