访谈录 2008-03-07&-3-09, 女人为什么会撒谎 I

Advice columnist¹ Ann Landers once said the naked truth is always better than the best-addressed lie. But some new information on women and lying could leave you wondering was anyone listening.

I'm sleeping with a 25-year-old.

what did you just say?

I'm sleeping with a 25-year-old.

On NBC's Lipstick² Jungle, one woman lies on the job when accused of sexual harassment³.

Is any truth? Jessie /,

No, absolutely not.

And in the classic film, / /, this woman is both chased wife and an unknown / husband, a prostitute.

Sure, these are the stories of the big and small screen, but / / / real-life drama more than you don't initially⁴ think.

A new book "Little white lies, deep dark screts" suggested that the answer to that question is yes. Its author found women use lies in a broad range of areas as a mean to an end. 75% of women say have to lie in the workplace to sustain their positions. 60% admit to addiction⁵ secret. 50% have mixed emotions about mothering.

I think that women, you know, keep secrets in order to protect themselves. uh, nobody likes to be judged, you know, I do have a very open relationship with my children, but when they ask me direct questions, I don't feel it will go with beneficial to, you know, to answer them.

I think everyone, you know, can tell the truth, after all, they are at different time, in different ways, in different situations, and because of that, you know, all different types of things can be considered lie, yeah.

Sometimes, I lay on bed and said, if that, if that telling a lie by not telling how you really feel, then I do, I'm going to yell it.

Lie is a survivor⁶ mechanism⁷, so we answer, we definitely all do it.

And Susan Shapiro Barash, she is the author of "Little white lies, deep dark secrets". / / is a relationship therapist. Good morning to both of you.

I want to point out that those two women, each of them, they are not serious liars⁸ by any means, they are just speaking in general terms about women and lie. And Susan, you find out that your research that most women live by this code of lying, secrets and the deception⁹. Is it something that harder white lie in us, or is it nurtured¹⁰?

I think it both mirrored, it's partly the culture, really almost encouraging women to make a secret of anything that is whether supposed to do, perhaps, addiction, women lie about money, and then nurturing¹¹ while our mother to often / / kind of, lie compassionately¹², you don't tell your French doesn't look good, in an address you don't tell your husband you don't like the necklace people at home.

But those are innocent lies, are they?

Innocent lies, but they can take you to the lie that you really need and sometimes it's just convenient to lie. That will be women have to decide.

We have some of our viewers to email us things that they lie about, and one woman wrote my biggest lie would be my happiness in my marriage. I'm actually miserable¹³ but put on the facade¹⁴ that all is ok. Another said that I don't tell my husband exactly how much money we have and what we owe. I also don't him how much of a tax refund¹⁵ we received.

Now those, those are going towards the bad, are they?

Well, these are better / lie, the lie to improve the situation, and you know if you reveal your secret, you feel that it is not really going to help you.

1 columnist   

n.专栏作家

参考例句：

• The host was interviewing a local columnist.节目主持人正在同一位当地的专栏作家交谈。
• She's a columnist for USA Today.她是《今日美国报》的专栏作家。

2 lipstick   

n.口红，唇膏

参考例句：

• Taking out her lipstick,she began to paint her lips.她拿出口红，开始往嘴唇上抹。
• Lipstick and hair conditioner are cosmetics.口红和护发素都是化妆品。

3 harassment   

n.骚扰，扰乱，烦恼，烦乱

参考例句：

• She often got telephone harassment at night these days.这些天她经常在夜晚受到电话骚扰。
• The company prohibits any form of harassment.公司禁止任何形式的骚扰行为。

4 initially   

adv.最初，开始

参考例句：

• The ban was initially opposed by the US.这一禁令首先遭到美国的反对。
• Feathers initially developed from insect scales.羽毛最初由昆虫的翅瓣演化而来。

5 addiction   

n.上瘾入迷，嗜好

参考例句：

• He stole money from his parents to feed his addiction.他从父母那儿偷钱以满足自己的嗜好。
• Areas of drug dealing are hellholes of addiction,poverty and murder.贩卖毒品的地区往往是吸毒上瘾、贫困和发生谋杀的地方。

6 survivor   

n.生存者，残存者，幸存者

参考例句：

• The sole survivor of the crash was an infant.这次撞车的惟一幸存者是一个婴儿。
• There was only one survivor of the plane crash.这次飞机失事中只有一名幸存者。

7 mechanism   

n.机械装置；机构，结构

参考例句：

• The bones and muscles are parts of the mechanism of the body.骨骼和肌肉是人体的组成部件。
• The mechanism of the machine is very complicated.这台机器的结构是非常复杂的。

8 liars   

说谎者( liar的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• The greatest liars talk most of themselves. 最爱自吹自擂的人是最大的说谎者。
• Honest boys despise lies and liars. 诚实的孩子鄙视谎言和说谎者。

9 deception   

n.欺骗，欺诈；骗局，诡计

参考例句：

• He admitted conspiring to obtain property by deception.他承认曾与人合谋骗取财产。
• He was jailed for two years for fraud and deception.他因为诈骗和欺诈入狱服刑两年。

10 nurtured   

养育( nurture的过去式和过去分词 )； 培育； 滋长； 助长

参考例句：

• She is looking fondly at the plants he had nurtured. 她深情地看着他培育的植物。
• Any latter-day Einstein would still be spotted and nurtured. 任何一个未来的爱因斯坦都会被发现并受到培养。

11 nurturing   

养育( nurture的现在分词 )； 培育； 滋长； 助长

参考例句：

• These delicate plants need careful nurturing. 这些幼嫩的植物需要精心培育。
• The modern conservatory is not an environment for nurturing plants. 这个现代化温室的环境不适合培育植物。

12 compassionately   

adv.表示怜悯地，有同情心地

参考例句：

• The man at her feet looked up at Scarlett compassionately. 那个躺在思嘉脚边的人同情地仰望着她。 来自飘（部分）
• Then almost compassionately he said,"You should be greatly rewarded." 接着他几乎带些怜悯似地说：“你是应当得到重重酬报的。” 来自辞典例句

13 miserable   

adj.悲惨的，痛苦的；可怜的，糟糕的

参考例句：

• It was miserable of you to make fun of him.你取笑他，这是可耻的。
• Her past life was miserable.她过去的生活很苦。

14 facade   

n.(建筑物的)正面，临街正面；外表

参考例句：

• The entrance facade consists of a large full height glass door.入口正面有一大型全高度玻璃门。
• If you look carefully,you can see through Bob's facade.如果你仔细观察，你就能看穿鲍勃的外表。

15 refund   

v.退还，偿还；n.归还，偿还额，退款

参考例句：

• They demand a refund on unsatisfactory goods.他们对不满意的货品要求退款。
• We'll refund your money if you aren't satisfied.你若不满意，我们愿意退款给你。