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建立人脉胆子小?这四点让你更讨巧

时间:2016-05-25 23:58来源:互联网 提供网友:mapleleaf   字体: [ ]
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    (单词翻译:双击或拖选)

 You're standing1 face-to-face with a professional in your industry who can help you advance your career. This is your chance to wow this person with a strong handshake, bright smile and direct eye contact, followed by a witty2 comment that initiates4 a loud fit of laughter.

现在,你和一个行业专家正面对面站着,并且这个专家对促进你的职业生涯有很大的帮助。这是一个机会,你可以先通过一次有力的握手,灿烂的微笑以及直接的对视来博得他对你的称赞,接着再以诙谐的话语引发彼此的开怀大笑。
However, you can't communicate well or make a good first impression when your mouth is dry, your palms are sweaty, your thoughts are scattered5 and you're blanking on that pitch you prepared.
但是,当你嘴唇发干,手心冒汗,思维分散,而且突然记不起之前准备的东西时,你就不可能表达得很好或者说给别人留下一个很好的第一印象。
Here's the good news: These nervous feelings and anxious thoughts are completely normal (and, in fact, very common), and there are ways to overcome them. Before you know it, you'll be shaking hands and expanding your network with ease and confidence.
这里有一个好消息:这些紧张的感觉和焦虑的情绪都是正常的(事实上,也很常见),并且有许多方法可以克服它们。在你知道这点之前,你要一直握手,然后轻松自信地扩大你的人际关系网。
Here are some networking tips to put to use when you feel intimidated6.
当你胆怯的时候可以使用下列方法来建立你的人际关系网。
建立人脉胆子小?这四点让你更讨巧
1. Forget about the business side
1. 忘记业务方面的事情
Remember that engaging in a professional relationship is not an immoral7 practice founded on dishonesty. Job seekers should focus on maintaining a casual mentality8 and they should approach networking with a genuine curiosity instead of a fear of failure (or the more complicated fear of success).
记住,构建职业上的人情关系,并不是一种建立在欺骗基础上的不道德行为。求职者们应该注意保持漫不经心的心态,他们应该出于真正的好奇心来接触同行,而不是因为害怕失败(或者是因渴望成功而产生的说不清道不明的恐惧感)。
In order to develop a relaxed mindset, job seekers should remind themselves that they are building a social network that is founded on mutual9 respect, genuine interest and a clear understanding of reciprocity.
为了培养放松的思维模式,求职者们应该提醒自己他们所在建立的社交网络是基于共同的尊重,真实的兴趣和互惠原则。
In other words, you aren't just hunting for favors and begging for advice and advancement10 opportunities. Besides, the people you meet and get to know while networking are just that — people. They have families, obligations, fears and strengths — and they spill mustard on their shirts just like you.
换句话说,你不能只是为了寻求帮助,恳求建议和发展机会。另外,当你建立人际关系网时你所见和所要结识的也是人。他们有家人,有责任,有忧惧和长处,也会像你一样把芥末酱洒在他们的衬衫上。
Once you remind yourself of the dynamics11 of a professional relationship, you can initiate3 conversations with confidence. Use a warm smile that says, "I'm approachable, and I'm excited to meet you."
一旦你自己想起了职业关系上的互动方式,你就可以发起一次自信的谈话。一个温暖的笑容可以说明,“我很友善,并且很高兴认识你。”
2. Nail down your pitch
2. 确定好你的选讲内容
According to a recent survey conducted by the University of Phoenix12 School of Business, 15% of working adults surveyed say they don't have enough experience to make networking worthwhile. Don't fall victim to missing out on a great opportunity just because your resume isn't robust13. This is where preparation comes in.
根据菲尼克斯大学商学院最近的一项调查,百分之十五被调查的成年工作者表示,他们不知道如何让人际关系网变得有价值。千万别只是因为简历不够好而成为了错失绝好机会的受害者。从这里参与准备吧。
Preparing a pitch can be tricky14 because it can sound like a sales tactic15. Avoid clichés and slogans so the listener knows that you're sincerely presenting actionable solutions and not blowing smoke just to get a new job. Ultimately, a pitch should be a clear expression of your purpose and intentions. Here's how to prep the perfect pitch:
准备个讲稿可能是件棘手的事情,因为它听起来像是一个销售策略。不要老生常谈和喊口号,以便听众能知道你在真诚地提出可行的解决方案,而不只是为了得到一份新工作在那里大肆吹嘘。最终,一次宣讲应能清楚地表达你的目的和意图。下面将告诉你该如何准备一次完美的宣讲:
Self-reflection: The first step is to really think about your goals. What is your purpose for speaking with this person? While the end goal is to advance your career in some way, your real focus is keeping the listener intrigued16. You want him or her to be hooked and listen to your entire story.
反省:第一步就是要好好考虑你的目标。你和这个人说话的目的是什么?当你最终的目标是想在某种程度上促进你的职业发展时,你真正的重点是要保持听众的兴趣。你想要吸引他们,并且希望他们能够听完你的整个故事。
Tell your story: Write a clear introduction that describes who you are, what you do and how you plan on helping17 the listener. Identify the problem that he or she has and show how your solution is the best one. This is where storytelling abilities come into play. Introduce a challenge, describe how you solved it and explain what you learned.
讲故事:写一份清晰的自我介绍,内容包括描述你是谁,你做什么的以及你计划怎么帮助你的听众。在确定好他们有这个问题后,接着你要展示出你的解决方案是最棒的一个。此处讲故事的能力就发挥了作用。你还要介绍下遇到的挑战,描述出你是如何解决这个问题以及从中学到了什么。
Integrate a call to action: Finally, leave the listener with something actionable. This is where you schedule a follow up, such as grabbing a cup of coffee or going out to lunch.
决定与行为相结合:最后你留给听众的应该是可执行的方案,此处你要安排一个后续行动,例如赶紧为他们弄杯咖啡或是带他们出去吃饭。
Practice makes perfect: Once you have this pitch written, read through it and practice several times. This is a great method for learning what you need to cover, but don't try to memorize and recite it word for word — your delivery shouldn't feel contrived18. You want to hit your strong talking points and deliver your pitch from a place of sincerity19 and confidence.
熟能生巧:一旦你写好了讲稿,要通读你的讲稿并进行多次的练习。这是了解你还需要包含哪些内容的最好的办法。但是不要试图逐字逐句地记忆和背诵——你的演说方式不应该让人感到不自然。你应该准确表现出你强有力的论据,并且以一种真诚自信的方式发表演讲。
3. Relax and stand tall
3. 放轻松,自信点
All of these networking tips are only effective if you feel relaxed. People project their emotional states more than they realize through nonverbal cues. For example, crossed arms communicate resistance and a sense of defensiveness20, whereas open arms make you appear more approachable.
所有这些建立人际关系网的技巧只有当你感到放松的时候才会有效。通过非语言的暗示,人们所表现出的情绪状态比他们意识到的要多。例如,双臂交叉表示抵抗和防卫意识。反之,双臂张开会让你显得更加友善。
Body language is more than just a representation of our emotional state. It can even affect our mentality. A September 2014 study conducted by researchers at the University of Auckland and published in Health Psychology21 found that standing up straight reduces stress. Upright participants said that they felt less fear, higher self-esteem and an overall better mood. Be mindful of your posture22 and how your body language is being presented when you're approaching people to network with. They're reading you before you have a chance to speak.
肢体语言不仅仅是我们情绪状态的体现。它甚至能影响我们的心态。2014年9月奥克兰大学曾在健康心理学上发表过一份研究,这份研究显示笔直站立能够减少压力。那些笔直站立了的参与者们说他们会感到不那么害怕,有更高的自尊并且整体上有一个更好的心情。当你接近并和他们打交道的时候,请注意你的仪态以及你所展现的肢体语言。他们会在你和他们交谈之前先猜测你。
There are several other simple techniques that can help reduce stress and put you in a relaxed mindset. Certain stretches can provide stress relief, such as ear-to-shoulder stretches, spine23 rotations24 and toe touching25. A study published by Oxford26 University Press in June 2014 found that regularly practicing yoga and other physical activity provided evidence of stress relief.
其他一些简单的技巧也可以帮助你减压,让你有个放松的思维模式。一些伸展动作可以让你的压力得到缓解,比如从耳朵到肩部的伸展,脊椎转体和脚尖碰触。牛津大学出版社在2014年6月发表的研究发现,定期做瑜伽练习和其他的物理运动证明了其能够缓解压力。
Also, practicing mindfulness through exercises like meditation27, yoga and tai chi can increase self-awareness and build skills to manage stress. These exercises can also reduce negative emotions. The Journal of Alternative and Complementary Medicine published a study in May 2014 providing evidence suggesting that consistent meditation practice improves a person's quality of life and general mental health. While incorporating practices like meditation into your daily routine would be the best practice, you should at least perform them leading up to a networking event or professional interaction.
同样,你可以通过诸如冥想,练瑜伽和打太极拳的方法来练习定力,这可以增强自我意识,培养应对压力的技能。这些锻炼也可以减少你的消极情绪。在2014年5月交替与补偿医学杂志发表了一项研究,该研究提供的证据显示坚持做冥想练习可以改善一个人的生活质量和一般的心理健康。并入一些像冥想的练习到你的日常生活中将是最好的做法。在要和别人打交道或进行工作上的互动时你至少要做些这样的练习。
Positive affirmations are a great way of shifting a negative mentality to a positive one. You can write your own by choosing a negative thought about yourself and writing the positive opposite that counteracts28 that belief. For example, if you're thinking, "I don't deserve this opportunity," you can write an affirmation like, "I deserve this, and I am excited to succeed." Affirmations like these are realistic and achievable perspectives that you can develop through repetition.
正面的肯定是一种转变消极心态到积极心态的最好办法。你可以写下关于你自己的消极想法,再写下积极的想法来抵消那种观点。例如,如果你认为“我不应该得到这个机会”,你可以写一个肯定的话“这是我应得的,我很高兴能够成功”。类似这些的肯定是符合实际且可实现的想法,你可以通过重复来培养这种正确认知。
4. Schedule the follow-up
4. 安排后续行动
Now that you're relaxed and armed with an awesome29 pitch and confident mindset, you are able to apply these networking tips. You have a great opportunity to seize or squander30 — don't do the latter. Make sure that once you shake hands, introduce yourself and nail that pitch, you schedule a follow-up.
由于你很放松,也已备有极好的讲稿和自信的思维模式,那么你就能运用这些建立人际关系网的方法。你有一个好机会可以抓住或者挥霍——千万不要做后者。确保在你握完手,介绍完自己并且确定好了讲稿后,你要安排个后续行动。
It's important to be clear about your intentions for a coffee or lunch meeting. For example, explain how you hope to discuss how you can be an asset to your contact's company in a more detailed31 way. Also, use this first follow-up to further your rapport32.
你要清楚你安排喝咖啡或者吃午餐的目的是什么,这点很重要。例如,说明你希望如何来讨论,如何以一个更详细的方法成为你熟人公司的财富。同样,你要利用这个后续行动让你们之间更融洽。
After the pitch and before the follow-up, send a quick email expressing your appreciation33 for their time. Finally, connect online through LinkedIn, and maintain an ongoing34 relationship with this contact and their network: Share information, join industry-related organizations, comment on relevant posts, and even contribute content to message boards.
在宣讲之后,后续行动之前,快速发个邮件,对他们此次的到来表达下你的感激之情。最后,通过LinkedIn(领英)进行在线联系,和这个熟人以及他们的人际关系网保持一个不断发展的关系:分享信息,加入与行业相关的组织,对相关帖子发表评论,甚至可以撰写一些内容到留言板。
These networking tips and relaxation35 techniques are realistic and effective methods for success.
这些建立人际关系网的技巧和放松窍门对于成功是实际有效的方法。

点击收听单词发音收听单词发音  

1 standing 2hCzgo     
n.持续,地位;adj.永久的,不动的,直立的,不流动的
参考例句:
  • After the earthquake only a few houses were left standing.地震过后只有几幢房屋还立着。
  • They're standing out against any change in the law.他们坚决反对对法律做任何修改。
2 witty GMmz0     
adj.机智的,风趣的
参考例句:
  • Her witty remarks added a little salt to the conversation.她的妙语使谈话增添了一些风趣。
  • He scored a bull's-eye in their argument with that witty retort.在他们的辩论中他那一句机智的反驳击中了要害。
3 initiate z6hxz     
vt.开始,创始,发动;启蒙,使入门;引入
参考例句:
  • A language teacher should initiate pupils into the elements of grammar.语言老师应该把基本语法教给学生。
  • They wanted to initiate a discussion on economics.他们想启动一次经济学讨论。
4 initiates e9c5430fb8a57cddedf60c5a1d5a56a7     
v.开始( initiate的第三人称单数 );传授;发起;接纳新成员
参考例句:
  • The booklet initiates us into the problems of living abroad. 这本小册子使我们对国外的生活情况有了初步了解。 来自《简明英汉词典》
  • Everybody initiates and receives messages in some form or other. 每个人都以各种不同的方式发出并接收信息。 来自辞典例句
5 scattered 7jgzKF     
adj.分散的,稀疏的;散步的;疏疏落落的
参考例句:
  • Gathering up his scattered papers,he pushed them into his case.他把散乱的文件收拾起来,塞进文件夹里。
6 intimidated 69a1f9d1d2d295a87a7e68b3f3fbd7d5     
v.恐吓;威胁adj.害怕的;受到威胁的
参考例句:
  • We try to make sure children don't feel intimidated on their first day at school. 我们努力确保孩子们在上学的第一天不胆怯。
  • The thief intimidated the boy into not telling the police. 这个贼恫吓那男孩使他不敢向警察报告。 来自《简明英汉词典》
7 immoral waCx8     
adj.不道德的,淫荡的,荒淫的,有伤风化的
参考例句:
  • She was questioned about his immoral conduct toward her.她被询问过有关他对她的不道德行为的情况。
  • It is my belief that nuclear weapons are immoral.我相信使核武器是不邪恶的。
8 mentality PoIzHP     
n.心理,思想,脑力
参考例句:
  • He has many years'experience of the criminal mentality.他研究犯罪心理有多年经验。
  • Running a business requires a very different mentality from being a salaried employee.经营企业所要求具备的心态和上班族的心态截然不同。
9 mutual eFOxC     
adj.相互的,彼此的;共同的,共有的
参考例句:
  • We must pull together for mutual interest.我们必须为相互的利益而通力合作。
  • Mutual interests tied us together.相互的利害关系把我们联系在一起。
10 advancement tzgziL     
n.前进,促进,提升
参考例句:
  • His new contribution to the advancement of physiology was well appreciated.他对生理学发展的新贡献获得高度赞赏。
  • The aim of a university should be the advancement of learning.大学的目标应是促进学术。
11 dynamics NuSzQq     
n.力学,动力学,动力,原动力;动态
参考例句:
  • In order to succeed,you must master complicated knowledge of dynamics.要取得胜利,你必须掌握很复杂的动力学知识。
  • Dynamics is a discipline that cannot be mastered without extensive practice.动力学是一门不做大量习题就不能掌握的学科。
12 phoenix 7Njxf     
n.凤凰,长生(不死)鸟;引申为重生
参考例句:
  • The airline rose like a phoenix from the ashes.这家航空公司又起死回生了。
  • The phoenix worship of China is fetish worship not totem adoration.中国凤崇拜是灵物崇拜而非图腾崇拜。
13 robust FXvx7     
adj.强壮的,强健的,粗野的,需要体力的,浓的
参考例句:
  • She is too tall and robust.她个子太高,身体太壮。
  • China wants to keep growth robust to reduce poverty and avoid job losses,AP commented.美联社评论道,中国希望保持经济强势增长,以减少贫困和失业状况。
14 tricky 9fCzyd     
adj.狡猾的,奸诈的;(工作等)棘手的,微妙的
参考例句:
  • I'm in a rather tricky position.Can you help me out?我的处境很棘手,你能帮我吗?
  • He avoided this tricky question and talked in generalities.他回避了这个非常微妙的问题,只做了个笼统的表述。
15 tactic Yqowc     
n.战略,策略;adj.战术的,有策略的
参考例句:
  • Reducing prices is a common sales tactic.降价是常用的销售策略。
  • She had often used the tactic of threatening to resign.她惯用以辞职相威胁的手法。
16 intrigued 7acc2a75074482e2b408c60187e27c73     
adj.好奇的,被迷住了的v.搞阴谋诡计(intrigue的过去式);激起…的兴趣或好奇心;“intrigue”的过去式和过去分词
参考例句:
  • You've really intrigued me—tell me more! 你说的真有意思—再给我讲一些吧!
  • He was intrigued by her story. 他被她的故事迷住了。
17 helping 2rGzDc     
n.食物的一份&adj.帮助人的,辅助的
参考例句:
  • The poor children regularly pony up for a second helping of my hamburger. 那些可怜的孩子们总是要求我把我的汉堡包再给他们一份。
  • By doing this, they may at times be helping to restore competition. 这样一来, 他在某些时候,有助于竞争的加强。
18 contrived ivBzmO     
adj.不自然的,做作的;虚构的
参考例句:
  • There was nothing contrived or calculated about what he said.他说的话里没有任何蓄意捏造的成分。
  • The plot seems contrived.情节看起来不真实。
19 sincerity zyZwY     
n.真诚,诚意;真实
参考例句:
  • His sincerity added much more authority to the story.他的真诚更增加了故事的说服力。
  • He tried hard to satisfy me of his sincerity.他竭力让我了解他的诚意。
20 defensiveness 39b9881a1c2671c68daf55d85ea2d993     
防御性
参考例句:
  • The fear of being sued for malpractice has magnified physicians' defensiveness. 担心因医疗事故而被起诉的恐惧加剧了医生们的防卫心理。
  • This outbreak of defensiveness embodies one paradox and several myths. 排外行动的爆发,体现了一个矛盾和几个“神话”。
21 psychology U0Wze     
n.心理,心理学,心理状态
参考例句:
  • She has a background in child psychology.她受过儿童心理学的教育。
  • He studied philosophy and psychology at Cambridge.他在剑桥大学学习哲学和心理学。
22 posture q1gzk     
n.姿势,姿态,心态,态度;v.作出某种姿势
参考例句:
  • The government adopted an uncompromising posture on the issue of independence.政府在独立这一问题上采取了毫不妥协的态度。
  • He tore off his coat and assumed a fighting posture.他脱掉上衣,摆出一副打架的架势。
23 spine lFQzT     
n.脊柱,脊椎;(动植物的)刺;书脊
参考例句:
  • He broke his spine in a fall from a horse.他从马上跌下摔断了脊梁骨。
  • His spine developed a slight curve.他的脊柱有点弯曲。
24 rotations d52e30a99086786b005c11c05b280215     
旋转( rotation的名词复数 ); 转动; 轮流; 轮换
参考例句:
  • Farmers traditionally used long-term rotations of hay, pasture, and corn. 农民以往长期实行干草、牧草和玉米轮作。
  • The crankshaft makes three rotations for each rotation of the rotor. 转子每转一周,曲轴转3周。
25 touching sg6zQ9     
adj.动人的,使人感伤的
参考例句:
  • It was a touching sight.这是一幅动人的景象。
  • His letter was touching.他的信很感人。
26 Oxford Wmmz0a     
n.牛津(英国城市)
参考例句:
  • At present he has become a Professor of Chemistry at Oxford.他现在已是牛津大学的化学教授了。
  • This is where the road to Oxford joins the road to London.这是去牛津的路与去伦敦的路的汇合处。
27 meditation yjXyr     
n.熟虑,(尤指宗教的)默想,沉思,(pl.)冥想录
参考例句:
  • This peaceful garden lends itself to meditation.这个恬静的花园适于冥想。
  • I'm sorry to interrupt your meditation.很抱歉,我打断了你的沉思。
28 counteracts 63ce8aebfaf0be5708aafd06ca84b3c1     
对抗,抵消( counteract的第三人称单数 )
参考例句:
  • The drug counteracts the effects of the poison. 这种药可抵消毒物的作用。
  • Offset Something that balances, counteracts, or compensates the effects of another thing. 弥补用来平衡、抵消或偿还另一财物的东西。
29 awesome CyCzdV     
adj.令人惊叹的,难得吓人的,很好的
参考例句:
  • The church in Ireland has always exercised an awesome power.爱尔兰的教堂一直掌握着令人敬畏的权力。
  • That new white convertible is totally awesome.那辆新的白色折篷汽车简直棒极了.
30 squander XrnyF     
v.浪费,挥霍
参考例句:
  • Don't squander your time in reading those dime novels.不要把你的时间浪费在读那些胡编乱造的廉价小说上。
  • Every chance is precious,so don't squander any chance away!每次机会都很宝贵,所以不要将任何一个白白放走。
31 detailed xuNzms     
adj.详细的,详尽的,极注意细节的,完全的
参考例句:
  • He had made a detailed study of the terrain.他对地形作了缜密的研究。
  • A detailed list of our publications is available on request.我们的出版物有一份详细的目录备索。
32 rapport EAFzg     
n.和睦,意见一致
参考例句:
  • She has an excellent rapport with her staff.她跟她职员的关系非常融洽。
  • We developed a high degree of trust and a considerable personal rapport.我们发展了高度的互相信任和不错的私人融洽关系。
33 appreciation Pv9zs     
n.评价;欣赏;感谢;领会,理解;价格上涨
参考例句:
  • I would like to express my appreciation and thanks to you all.我想对你们所有人表达我的感激和谢意。
  • I'll be sending them a donation in appreciation of their help.我将送给他们一笔捐款以感谢他们的帮助。
34 ongoing 6RvzT     
adj.进行中的,前进的
参考例句:
  • The problem is ongoing.这个问题尚未解决。
  • The issues raised in the report relate directly to Age Concern's ongoing work in this area.报告中提出的问题与“关心老人”组织在这方面正在做的工作有直接的关系。
35 relaxation MVmxj     
n.松弛,放松;休息;消遣;娱乐
参考例句:
  • The minister has consistently opposed any relaxation in the law.部长一向反对法律上的任何放宽。
  • She listens to classical music for relaxation.她听古典音乐放松。
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