你应该保持沉默的十大场合

 　　Ever feel like you’ve gone and said too much? Again? Maybe you kill a joke or ruin a great moment. Foot in ze ol’ mouth.

　　是不是觉得自己又说太多了？也许你不经意就会毁了一个笑话，或是完全破坏了气氛。要记住祸从口出呐。

　　Well listen up. And shut up. Not many people know it but shutting up can be the trump¹ card in a lot of situations.

　　我们应该多听，不该说话的时候学会闭嘴。不是每个人都知晓这一点，但沉默在很多场合下的确是最好的王牌。

　　Shutting up helps you appear wise and avoid conflict. In general, it can make life easier which it turn makes you a happier person. Here’s how and when to just shut up.

　　沉默会让你更加智慧，避免纷争。总而言之，它能让生活更加简单，让你成为更快乐的人。下面将告诉你在什么时候应该学会沉默。

　　1) When people are gossiping

　　1. 大家在八卦时

　　People love gossiping and many of us can’t help it. It’s refreshing². It makes life seem a bit better. But the next time you hear gossiping, especially about your friends, try holding your tongue. Listen to what the gossiper is saying, it may reveal a lot about both parties. Instead of being like “yeahh, she is a b*$$#,” try saying “well, she’s trying her hardest” and see what the response is. Deny yourself that tiny pleasure from putting someone else down.

　　人们都爱八卦，这是大家没法控制的事情。八卦能让人精神振奋，似乎生活也变得更好了。但如果你听到了一些八卦，尤其是关于你朋友的，还是闭上嘴吧。听听那些聊八卦的人在说什么，也许能让你更加了解自己的朋友。与其说：“是啊，她真的很贱。” 不如说：“我知道她已经很努力了”，看看别人的反应。别让自己的小快乐建立在贬低别人的基础上。

　　2) When asked about your love life

　　2. 被问到感情生活时

　　How was last night? Did it go well wink³ wink? We’ve all heard these prying⁴ questions from roommates and friends and it’s fun boasting our conquests (especially when they’re few and far between). But you’re better off remaining mysterious. Keeping quiet about your hookups will make your admirers respect, and seek you out, even more. Only talk love life if you really need advice.

　　昨晚怎么样？约会进展如何？我们的室友和朋友们往往会问出这样窥探类的问题，炫耀自己的战利品的确很有意思（尤其是TA们的确很出色的话），但你最好还是保持点神秘感。对自己的约会守口如瓶还能让你的追求者们更加尊重欣赏你。等到实在需要建议时再谈论自己的感情生活吧。

　　3) After an obviously erroneous statement

　　3. 在别人发表明显错误的言论后

　　We all get called out from time to time at the office and in social settings. But sometimes letting someone’s accusation⁵ linger in the air exposes its flaws. Sure you’ve got to defend yourself sometimes, but if someone takes a really stupid jab at you, and others notice, you might look stronger just saying nothing and chuckling⁶ instead. Let that person roast in their own stupidity.

　　我们时不时会被叫去办公室（类似这样的公开环境里）谈话。有时任别人对你公开的指责往往能暴露他的缺陷。你当然可以辩解，但如果某人对你进行愚蠢的攻击，其他人也注意到了，你倒不如保持沉默轻声的笑一笑，这样会让你看起来更加强大。就让那个人充分展现自己愚蠢的一面吧！

　　4) At the near-end of a joke

　　4. 笑话的尾声

　　No one likes the guy who kills a joke. Instead of asking, “wait what was that?” just play along with jokes and funny stories, even those you don’t fully⁷ understand, adding new information instead of beating the heck out of them. You’ll be more popular starting a joke than finishing it.

　　没有人喜欢破坏笑话的人。与其问“等等，你刚才说了什么？” 不如假装一直很享受这些笑话和故事，哪怕你根本没听懂，加点新信息进去，而不是彻底毁了这些笑话，这样的幽默能让你更加受欢迎哦。

　　5) When you’re the expert

　　5. 你是专家时

　　Experts are reserved. They wisely interject their knowledge into a discussion. So when your friend or colleague sets you up saying “hey, he knows all about this” at dinner don’t feel like you have to pour out all your knowledge. No need to prove yourself. Instead, be reserved, say thanks, and give a concise⁸, even self-deprecating summary of what you do. Try to act like you get congratulated all the time.

　　真人不露相。他们总是巧妙的把自己的知识插入讨论之中。所以如果饭局上你的朋友或同事把你推出来说“嗨，他是这方面的专家，” 千万别觉得你得把肚子里的知识全部倒出来。真的没必要证实自己。不如隐藏一下，说句谢谢，对自己干的事情做一个简洁谦逊的总结。要表现的自己像一直需要被鼓励的人那样。

　　6) When under fire

　　6. 矛盾激化时

　　Getting in trouble is a part of life and sometimes the person in power just needs to run through everything they’re upset about. Bosses yell, referees⁹ yells, our spouses¹⁰ yell. It does not always help to talk back. On the other hand, be silent and take the blows, then find a good time to say a concise sorry. Even if you’re not in the wrong. This will get you out of jail and on with your life a whole lot quicker.

　　人生总是难免遇到麻烦。有权利的人往往需要对所有让他们失望的事发泄一下。老板在咆哮，裁判在咆哮，我们的另一半也在咆哮。其实并不需要去回应他们。不如保持沉默，一一承受，再找个合适的时机简单说一句对不起,哪怕你没有做错。你就会脱离苦海，生活进展更快。

　　7) When talking about money

　　7. 谈到钱的问题

　　Don’t mention your salary when others are bragging¹¹ and don’t whine¹² about being owed money. Lend to your friends, it’ll come back around. An aura of quiet confidence around money issues will help you someday find riches.

　　在别人吹牛时，别也跟着提及自己的薪水问题，更不要对借出去的钱发牢骚。借给你的朋友，他们总会还的。在钱的问题上保持沉默，这样的自信总会有天让你发现其价值所在。

　　8) In line at an event

　　8. 排队等候时

　　This one is specific, but I’ve noticed that those who wait patiently to get into a club or concert often get through faster than the loud mouths begging for entrance. Being loud and belligerent¹³ gets you nowhere and a quiet confidence makes it look like you belong.

　　这条比较特别，但我发现那些静静等候俱乐部或音乐会入场的人往往比那些吵吵闹闹的人们进去的要快。吵吵闹闹只会让你找不到方向，安静一点才让你看起来真正属于这里。

　　9) When congratulated

　　9. 被祝贺时

　　A smooth and confident “thank you” is the best response to a congratulations. It’s true. Just saying thank you is enough. Don’t say “oh, well it was all him” or “yeah, I don’t know how I did it” or something equally blasé. Just be the man, say thank you, and go dominate your next conquest.

　　对于祝贺最好的回答莫过于一句“谢谢”。的确是这样，说谢谢就够了。不要说“这都是他的功劳” 或是“啊，我都不知道自己怎么做到的”，或是其他类似的话语。就绅士点，说句谢谢吧，然后向着自己下个目标进军。

　　10) When some is divulging¹⁴ secrets

　　10. 某人对你吐露秘密时

　　If you find yourself in a rare moment when someone in power or with useful information has decided¹⁵ to pour it out for you, please just listen. You’ll learn a lot. Understand how valuable the information is and store it away for use later on. A smile is all the response you need to give.

　　如果你发现自己身处一个特殊的场合，某个有权利的人或掌握有用消息的人突然对你倾诉，那就好好倾听吧。你会学到很多东西。了解这些信息到底有多重要，然后自己消化以备以后的需要。这种情况下你只需要回馈一个笑容。

　　Shutting up is an art form. Spot these moments in advance and trust me, you’ll reap the silent benefits.

　　学会沉默是一门艺术。提前知晓这些该沉默的场合，相信我，你会从中受益良多。

1 trump   

n.王牌，法宝；v.打出王牌，吹喇叭

参考例句：

• He was never able to trump up the courage to have a showdown.他始终鼓不起勇气摊牌。
• The coach saved his star player for a trump card.教练保留他的明星选手，作为他的王牌。

2 refreshing   

adj.使精神振作的，使人清爽的，使人喜欢的

参考例句：

• I find it'so refreshing to work with young people in this department.我发现和这一部门的青年一起工作令人精神振奋。
• The water was cold and wonderfully refreshing.水很涼，特别解乏提神。

3 wink   

n.眨眼，使眼色，瞬间；v.眨眼，使眼色，闪烁

参考例句：

• He tipped me the wink not to buy at that price.他眨眼暗示我按那个价格就不要买。
• The satellite disappeared in a wink.瞬息之间，那颗卫星就消失了。

4 prying   

adj.爱打听的v.打听，刺探（他人的私事）( pry的现在分词 )；撬开

参考例句：

• I'm sick of you prying into my personal life! 我讨厌你刺探我的私生活！
• She is always prying into other people's affairs. 她总是打听别人的私事。 来自《简明英汉词典》

5 accusation   

n.控告，指责，谴责

参考例句：

• I was furious at his making such an accusation.我对他的这种责备非常气愤。
• She knew that no one would believe her accusation.她知道没人会相信她的指控。

6 chuckling   

轻声地笑( chuckle的现在分词 )

参考例句：

• I could hear him chuckling to himself as he read his book. 他看书时，我能听见他的轻声发笑。
• He couldn't help chuckling aloud. 他忍不住的笑了出来。 来自汉英文学 - 骆驼祥子

7 fully   

adv.完全地，全部地，彻底地；充分地

参考例句：

• The doctor asked me to breathe in,then to breathe out fully.医生让我先吸气，然后全部呼出。
• They soon became fully integrated into the local community.他们很快就完全融入了当地人的圈子。

8 concise   

adj.简洁的，简明的

参考例句：

• The explanation in this dictionary is concise and to the point.这部词典里的释义简明扼要。
• I gave a concise answer about this.我对于此事给了一个简要的答复。

9 referees   

n.裁判员( referee的名词复数 )；证明人；公断人；（专业性强的文章的）审阅人

参考例句：

• The fiery player has had numerous run-ins with referees. 这位脾气暴躁的队员曾和裁判员发生过无数次争吵。
• If you want to appeal, the Court of Referees will decide. 如果你要上诉，可以由仲裁法庭去判决。 来自辞典例句

10 spouses   

n.配偶，夫或妻( spouse的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• Jobs are available for spouses on campus and in the community. 校园里和社区里有配偶可做的工作。 来自辞典例句
• An astonishing number of spouses-most particularly in the upper-income brackets-have no close notion of their husbands'paychecks. 相当大一部分妇女——特别在高收入阶层——并不很了解他们丈夫的薪金。 来自辞典例句

11 bragging   

v.自夸，吹嘘( brag的现在分词 )；大话

参考例句：

• He's always bragging about his prowess as a cricketer. 他总是吹嘘自己板球水平高超。 来自辞典例句
• Now you're bragging, darling. You know you don't need to brag. 这就是夸口，亲爱的。你明知道你不必吹。 来自辞典例句

12 whine   

v.哀号，号哭；n.哀鸣

参考例句：

• You are getting paid to think,not to whine.支付给你工资是让你思考而不是哀怨的。
• The bullet hit a rock and rocketed with a sharp whine.子弹打在一块岩石上，一声尖厉的呼啸，跳飞开去。

13 belligerent   

adj.好战的，挑起战争的；n.交战国，交战者

参考例句：

• He had a belligerent aspect.他有种好斗的神色。
• Our government has forbidden exporting the petroleum to the belligerent countries.我们政府已经禁止向交战国输出石油。

14 divulging   

v.吐露，泄露( divulge的现在分词 )

参考例句：

• The soldier was shot for divulging the plans to the enemy. 这个士兵因向敌人泄密被击毙。 来自互联网
• Gives itself a small seat. Divulging heartily. 给自己一个小位子。尽情的宣泄。 来自互联网

15 decided   

adj.决定了的，坚决的；明显的，明确的

参考例句：

• This gave them a decided advantage over their opponents.这使他们比对手具有明显的优势。
• There is a decided difference between British and Chinese way of greeting.英国人和中国人打招呼的方式有很明显的区别。