男性和女性专用英语

    Yes = No.

    No = Yes.

    Maybe = No.

    I'm sorry = You'll be sorry.

    We need = I want.

    It's your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now.

    Do what you want = You'll pay for this later.

    We need to talk = I need to complain.

    Sure go ahead = I don't want you to.

    I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you moron¹!

    You're so manly² = You need a shave and you sweat a lot.

    You're certainly attentive³ tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?

    Be romantic, turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs⁴.

    This kitchen is so inconvenient⁵ = I want a new house.

    I want new curtains = and carpeting, and furniture, and wallpaper.

    Hang the picture there = NO, I mean hang it there!

    I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep.

    Do you love me? = I'm going to ask for something expensive.

    How much do you love me? = I did something today you're really not going to like.

    I'll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV.

    Is my butt⁶ fat? = Tell me I'm beautiful.

    You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me.

    Are you listening to me!? =　Too late, you're dead.

    Was that the baby? = Why don't you get out of bed and walk him until he goes to sleep.

    I'm not yelling! = Yes I am yelling because I think this is important.

    The same old thing = Nothing.

    Nothing = Everything.

    Everything = My PMS is acting⁷ up.

    Nothing, really = It's just that you're such an asshole.

    2、男“性“英语摘要：不光女性有自己独特的表达方式，男人同样也有自己独特的表达方式，相比女性而言，男人的语言更加直接，更加生理，更加下半身。

    I'm hungry = I'm hungry.

    I'm sleepy = I'm sleepy.

    I'm tired　= I'm tired.

    Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you.

    Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you.

    Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you.

    May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you.

    Nice dress! = Nice cleavage!

    You look tense, let me give you a massage⁸ = I want to fondle you.

    What's wrong? = I don't see why you are making such a big deal out of this.

    What's wrong? = What meaningless self-inflicted psychological trauma⁹ are you going through now?

    What's wrong? = I guess sex tonight is out of the question.

    I'm bored = Do you want to have sex?

    I love you = Let's have sex now.

    I love you, too = Okay, I said it, we'd better have sex now!

    Yes, I like the way you cut your hair = I liked it better before.

    Yes, I like the way you cut your hair = $50 and it doesn't look that much different!

    Let's talk = I am trying to impress you by showing that I am a deep.

    person and maybe then you'd like to have sex with me.

    Will you marry me? = I want to make it illegal for you to have sex with other guys.

    (while shopping) I like that one better = Pick any freakin' dress and let's go home!

    I don't think that blouse and that skirt go well together = I am gay

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