[00:07.54]They liked him? 观众喜欢他?

　　[00:09.34]Liked him? They loved him. Ninety-three percent positive. 他们爱死他了, 百分之九十三都说赞

　　[00:11.74]-How is that possible? -Well, l don't know. - 怎么可能? - 不知

　　[00:14.30]But l am scaling back the news and giving it to The Ugly Truth. 不过我要缩短新闻时间 挪来播《真相挖挖哇》

　　[00:16.58]Stuart, l really think this is a mistake. What do we even know about this guy? 史都华,我认为这是不对的 我们对这家伙到底认识多少?

　　[00:21.50]-Who is he, really? -Moved here when he was 1 0... - 他到底是谁? - 他十岁移居本地

　　[00:25.98]...pitched two consecutive Little League Championships. Cute. 两届少棒冠军赛投手,好可爱

　　[00:26.94]''Most Likely to Get Slapped'' in his senior yearbook. 高中纪念册获选为爆衰男

　　[00:31.62]Three years San Jose State. Salesman of the Year at Dobson Medical in '04. 在圣荷西大学念了三年 多森医疗用品04年最佳业务员

　　[00:35.22]Once arrested for urinating out of a moving vehicle-- That is challenging. 曾因在疾驶车辆上向外尿尿被捕 这招还真厉害

　　[00:39.78]-Tell me about it. -Never married, hates asparagus. - 那还用说 - 没结过婚,讨厌芦笋

　　[00:40.78]Look, let's just keep a smile on this guy's face... 我们继续让这家伙高兴

　　[00:45.34]...and we'll both get our contracts renewed. 公司就会跟我们续约

　　[00:47.50]Congratulations? 恭喜?

　　[01:04.58]Mike. Hi, it's Lauren. I'm having a party on Saturday... 麦克,我是萝纶 我周六办轰趴

　　[01:10.18]...and you know what happens when I drink tequila. 你很清楚我喝了酒会怎样

　　[01:14.62]It's me, Nikki. Why haven't you called me? I miss you. 是我,妮基 你怎么都没打给我?我好想你

　　[01:21.30]-I can't stop thinking about your huge-- -Hey. - 我忍不住想起你那庞然巨物… - 嘿…

　　[01:25.98]-Who's that? -Rubbing all over my-- - 那是谁啊? - 摩擦我全身

　　[01:29.98]-Dripping wet-- -How was--? - 又湿又黏 - 学校…

　　[01:35.26]How was school? 学校好吗?

　　[01:35.54]-Well, you totally hosed me. -What? - 你完全骗倒我了 - 什么?

　　[01:41.02]Last week on your show, you said, ''Always be mean to hot girls... 上周你在节目上说 〝对辣妹一定要凶

　　[01:42.26]...because they'll want you more.'' Well, l tried it on Shauna. 她们才会哈你〞 我对萧娜试了这招

　　[01:46.86]She cried, and then l got detention. 她哭了,接着我就被罚课后留校

　　[01:47.74]First of all, don't listen to what l say on my show. 首先,不要听我在节目上说的话

　　[01:52.34]Second of all, you're supposed to do that to 25-year-old girls... 其次,这招对25岁的妹才有用

　　[01:56.10]...who think they're hot and can get any guy they want... 尤其是自认性感又吸引男人的妹

　　[01:58.58]...not 1 4-year-old girls. 不是14岁的妹

　　[02:02.18]They're going through puberty. 她们正值青春期

　　[02:02.58]They got enough problems. 麻烦已经够多了

　　[02:06.46]Mom said when she was 1 4, she was the prettiest girl in class. 妈说她14岁时是全班最美的

　　[02:08.46]Well, l was there when she was 1 4, and let me tell you something. She lied. 她14岁时我在场,我告诉你吧 她说谎

　　[02:13.30]Don't listen to your Uncle Mike. 别听你麦克叔叔的

　　[02:14.22]He was blind from touching himself inappropriately. 他那时满脑子只想自己摸自己

　　[02:18.66]That's a nice thing to tell your son. 你对儿子还真坦白啊

　　[02:20.54]Like he hasn't heard worse on your show. 他在你节目上听到的更精彩吧

　　[02:23.02]Let's hope you can clean it up now that you're on a network. 希望你在大电视台有收敛一点

　　[02:27.10]Congrats. 恭喜你!

　　[02:43.74]D'Artagnan, no, you didn't. 达太安,不行!不可以!

　　[02:47.82]No, D'Artagnan, you get back here. Get back here. 你给我回来,快回来

　　[02:49.78]No, do not-- No, no, no. 不要!不…

　　[02:54.66]D'Artagnan. 达太安《人人听力网www.rrting.com》

　　[02:57.54]D'Artagnan. 达太安

　　[03:00.22]Shit. 妈啦!

　　[03:03.42]All right. 好吧

　　[03:06.02]l'll just come up. 我上去

　　[03:08.58]l'm really not that flexible, D'Artagnan. l'm coming. 我身手没那么好 我来了

　　[03:13.86]l got you, hold on. 我会救你,等等

　　[03:16.02]Hold on. Come here, baby. 等等,过来,宝贝

　　[03:16.10]No, no. No, no. Come on. Come here, D'Artagnan. 不…过来,达太安

　　[03:21.02]Good boy. Oh, good boy. Okay. 乖猫咪 好孩子,好了

　　[03:21.98]Okay. You're gonna be okay. 好了,你不会有事的

　　[03:24.58]l hope we can get down. 希望我们下得去

　　[03:35.74]Oh, my. 哇塞

　　[03:41.06]Oh, my. 哇塞

　　[03:44.66]My, my. 哇哇塞

　　[03:50.42]He flosses. 他用牙线耶

　　[04:00.06]Oh, my God! Oh, my God. 天哪!我的天哪

　　[04:00.14]Somebody help me! Somebody help me! 快来人帮帮我,救命!

　　[04:04.42]l'm stuck in a tree! 我卡在树上了!

　　[04:06.94]Help me! Anybody! 救命! 来人啊!

　　[04:08.10]-l'm stuck in a tree! l'm stuck! -Stay, stay calm. - 我卡在树上 - 别紧张

　　[04:10.18]-You're gonna be fine. -Get me down! Get me down! - 你不会有事的 - 放我下来!我下不去!

　　[04:16.30]Sorry. Oh, my God. 对不起,我的老天

　　[04:18.78]So you just moved in. That's great. 你刚搬来啊,太好了

　　[04:20.22]l'm Abby, by the way. 我是艾比

　　[04:22.82]Your neighbor from across the way. 是你对面的邻居

　　[04:25.30]-So you're a doctor? -An orthopedic surgeon. - 原来你是医生 - 整形外科医师

　　[04:28.30]Yeah, l do a lot of leg and hip stuff, but l do get the occasional foot. 是啊,我常修整腿和臀的伤口 不过我偶尔也医脚

　　[04:34.18]Your ankle seems to be fine. Just a mild sprain, this should help. 你脚踝只是扭伤,这应该有用

　　[04:35.54]Great. Thank you. 太好了,谢谢你

　　[04:38.42]l guess l'm pretty lucky my cat chose the tree outside your window to climb. 看来我的猫选你窗外的树来爬 算我走运罗

　　[04:42.42]l'm here whenever you need me. 你有任何需要随时找我

　　[04:45.98]l'm gonna put my home number on the back of my business card. 我把我家电话写在名片背面

　　[04:49.26]lf your ankle starts giving you any problems, give me a call. 要是你脚踝有问题,就打给我

　　[04:49.66]Great. Thanks. 太好了,谢谢

　　[04:57.14]Oh, wow, that's so weird. He doesn't usually like men. 真是怪了,它平常不喜欢男人的

　　[04:59.10]Well, you know, dogs are great, but l'm a cat person. 你知道,狗是不错啦 不过我更爱猫