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Host: And Helen Fisher is the author of Why We Love and studied relationships for years. Hey, Helen nice to see you. So it's a little bit like ok when, when people get(s) together, initially they say ah, there is such chemistry (Right.)between me and her. That's true, but unfortunately it seems like the chemistry changes after a year. You buy it?
H: Uh, it... probably not after a year. I mean, actually this study they said it was one to two years. But they also were studying only people who were um said that they were not in love after that period of time. So they weren't studying people who re... remained in love, which is possible you know.
Host: When we talk .... Before we talk about the concept, then let's just talk about the study. (Right.) If it was a good sampling, do you think it was an accurate study?
H: Well, it's hard to know. I mean they had 39 people and would have been great if they had 1039. But 39 is better than nothing, then. You know you would expect, I mean, this is one of the most powerful experiences on earth when men make love and it's much more powerful than the sex drive. And you would expect all kinds of bodily chemicals to be involved in it. What they've done is they found just another.
Host: Have we heard about these nerve growth factors before? I mean that did, did they apply in other situations?
H: Yeah absolutely. They help with the nourishment of the cells of the body. And some people think that they are associated also with anxiety, and feelings of dependence and euphoria, which are associated with romantic love.
Host: What about age? Does that apply in here? I mean do you , do you tend to have more fluctuation in the levels of these things when you are younger or when you are older?
H: We don't know about nerve growth factor. But I studied 430 Americans and actually 420 Japanese and my sample of people over 45 show just as mush as that sweaty palms syndrome as those who are under 25, so...
Host: So you don't lose that puppy love feeling just because you are 45 years old.
H: No, you know what, I have had an 8-year-old boy, perfectly described to me his infatuation for an 8-year-old girl. And I certainly know people in their 70s who are mad in love. I think this is a brain system a lot like the fear system. It can be triggered at anytime in life.
Host: If there is in fact a decrease in certain body chemicals(Right.) and the euphoria starts to wane. Is there anything people can do to keep it going?
H: Yes, very definitely. First of all, you gotta pick the right person so that there is real chemical continuing reaction between the two of you. And second you can do novel things together. Novelty drives the levels of the dopamine in the brain, and I and my colleagues have found that dopamine in the brain is associated with romantic love so that's why vacations are so exciting. You know you do something novel, you do something exciting. It changes those chemicals and you can feel that feeling again.
Host: By the way, you don't think it's a bad idea if the euphoria goes at the end of the year because if you stay in the relationship, you will find out if you really truly love that person or you are just having a chemical reaction?
H: Absolutely, absolutely, as a matter of fact I mean, you know, I've often recommended to people that, you know, waiting till that intense passion wears off then you know what you've got.
Host: Call me in a year, right. Helen Fisher, thanks so much.
H: Thank you.
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