That's not the worst part, though, he continued to whisper. He acted as if I hadn't spoken. Not seeing you there on the floor… crumpled and broken. His voice was choked.  “不过，这还不是最糟糕部分。”他继续耳语着，表现得就好像我什么也没说一样。“不是看到你躺在地板上……扭曲着，伤痕累累。”他的声音有些梗咽。

　　Not thinking I was too late. Not even hearing you scream in pain all those unbearable memories that I'll carry with me for the rest of eternity.  “不是以为我已经来得太迟。甚至不是听到了你痛苦的尖叫——这一切令人难以忍受的记忆都将会在我无尽的余生中纠缠着我。

　　No, the very worst was feeling… knowing that I couldn't stop. Believing that I was going to kill you myself. 不，最糟糕的是那种感觉……我知道我没法停下来。我确信我会亲手杀了你的。”

　　But you didn't. “可你没有。”

　　I could have. So easily. “我会的。只差一点。”

　　I knew I needed to stay calm… but he was trying to talk himself into leaving me, and the panic fluttered in my lungs, trying to get out. 我知道我必须保持冷静……但他正在试图说服自己离开我，恐惧在我的肺部里挣扎着，想要冲出来。

　　Promise me, I whispered. “向我保证。”我耳语着。

　　What? “什么？”

　　You know what. I was starting to get angry now. He was so stubbornly determined to dwell on the negative. “你知道的。”现在我开始生气了。他太固执地决心要详细描述那些消极的事情。

　　He heard the change in my tone. His eyes tightened. I don't seem to be strong enough to stay away from you,  他听出了我语气的变化。他的眼神紧绷起来。“我不够坚强，没法让自己离开你，

　　so I suppose that you'll get your way… whether it kills you or not, he added roughly. 所以我猜你得用你自己的方式离开……不管这会不会杀了你。”他粗鲁地补充道。