访谈录 Interview 2007-08-31&09-02, 钱可以买到友情吗？（在线收听） |
| Vera Gibbons covers issues of wealth for the show high network on CNBC. And Barbara Melamed is a clinical psychologist at Mercy College here in New York. Good morning to both of you, nice to have you.[Hi.Hi,how are you?] You just see there in that clip, Jennifer Aniston is kind of trying to ask her way if she can get a little money from her friend. She doesn't get it. But when it comes to the subject of money between friends, it can get very complicated, especially if you're one on the side that you don't have as much as your friend, right, Vera ? Yeah, it can really put a wedge in even the closest old friends, which is why communication 101 is essential. Money can buy friends. But I would question the legitimacy of those friendships. We see in Hollywood, money buys a lot of entourage.[Yes.] And with all these young girls and the people that follow them. And they are not necessarily happy. And they are not necessarily, they are not necessarily true friends. I mean, how do you define who is a true friend, Barbara? When they are there for you. And sometimes you can't buy that.[In the tough times.] They have to be able to reciprocate, and you know, I have a very rich friend and I say, Hey, let's just go to a lower cost restaurant coz I'd like to pay the bill this time.[Sharing.] More focus on the intrinsic things as opposed to the materialistic things.[Right.] How does money complicate friendships then? I mean, what, does it get in the way more often than not, Vera? It can. Yes, it can definitely. What, well, in my clinical practice, I find out that 84% of the couples that come have money problems. And rich people have as many or even more money problems in terms of whether they are friends or they are gonna be fair with their friends[in their relationships], you know, rich one day, poor the next. I'm gonna stay with my friend. And when the money is gone, so are the friends. I mean the people who are actually buying these friendships are insecure, socially inept people generally speaking. So they are tapping into the one thing that they have access (to) which is money and that's buying them social circles, that's buying them material goods , that's ultimately [buying them pleasure.]Yeah ,statistically, you are seeing a lot more people on the high network side, right?[Yes!] who are buying toys and surrounding themselves with? What they have...Yeah, exactly. Because there are so many more millionaires and multimillionaires and billionaires out there. They have all the toys and some people are really drawn to that. They wanna hang around these people.[It's a power trip to some of them,sure.]And some of these people actually who have the money they don't actually care. Because they're getting something back. |
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