09年12月四级作文预测及范文(08)(在线收听

 09年12月四级作文预测及范文(08)

Directions: For this part, you are allowed 30 minutes to write a composition on the

topic A Food Poisoning Accident. You should write at least 120 words, and base your

composition on the outline (given in Chinese) below:
  你的几个同学因食用了从某超市买回的食品而中毒,幸亏及时治疗而脱险。请描述他(们)中毒

与脱险的过程,并呼吁要加强食品安全。
  A Food Poisoning Accident
行文思路
  本题属于情景式命题。提纲要求描述一件事情的经过,由此可判断本文应为记叙文。
  根据所给提纲,本文应包含如下内容:交待食物中毒的背景和原因;叙述中毒的和脱险的经过;

谈谈由此引发的感想,呼吁加强食品安全。
  高分范文
  A Food Poisoning Accident
  Last month, I [1]witnessed a food poisoning accident [2]happening to my

classmates. At that time the situation was really very dangerous and urgent. Though

finally they got out of danger, this accident [3]is still vivid in my mind.
  That day was Julie’s birthday, one of my classmates. In order to celebrate it,

her roommates bought a big birthday cake for her from a supermarket nearby. They

shared the cake happily. [4]However, after a while, all of them felt abdominal pain,

nausea and dizziness. Two of them even cannot stand up because of great pain. We [5]

rushed to send them to the hospital. [6]It turned out that the cake they ate had

expired its guarantee period. Futunately, [7]due to timely treatment, they all

recovered very soon.
  [4]However, this accident [8]leaves me a deep ponder. I think it is very urgent to

take effective measures to improve food safety. [4]Firstly, the government should [9]

strengthen supervision and administration on food safety. [4]More importantly, to

those who immoral businessmen, more strict punishment should be given. [4]Besides, we

consumers should be more careful in buying food. [10]Only in this way can we make sure

that no same accident happens.
  【亮点点评】
  [1]“目睹,目击”。
  [2]“发生在某人身上”,现在分词短语作定语。
  [3]“仍然令我记忆犹新”。
  [4]过渡衔接词语,使文章条理清晰、衔接紧密。
  [5]“闻讯赶来”。
  [6]“结果是,原来是”。
  [7]“由于及时的治疗”。
  [8]“留给我深深的思考”。
  [9]“加强监管”。
  [10]“only+状语”位于句首,引起句子部分倒装。

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