'Don't Cry Over Spilt Milk'

 

Now, the VOA Learning English program Words and Their Stories.

Okay, who here has never made a mistake?

The answer is, of course, no one.

Mistakes are not just a fact of life, they are an important part of the learning process. However, regretting our mistakes day in and day out is not healthy. We need to learn from them and then move on.

But do not take my word for it. One of America’s most famous and influential¹ writers and thinkers, Ralph Waldo Emerson, said it much better than I can.

Before we hear his famous statement, let’s talk about some words he used in it.

When Emerson says “blunders² and absurdities³,” he simply means mistakes. To do something filled with peaceful feelings is to do something “serenely⁴.” However, to be “encumbered⁵” is the opposite. This means to be heavy and loaded down with things. To Emerson, those “things” are past mistakes, or as he calls them “your old nonsense.”

Now, here’s Bryan Lynn reading Ralph Waldo Emerson’s famous quote.

“Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day. You shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.”

To this day, many people use this quote to remind themselves not to dwell⁶ in the past. When we dwell on something, we think about it constantly. It becomes a distraction⁷ and keeps us from moving forward.

Now, this famous quote is useful, but it is a bit long. Perhaps you would rather use a shorter, food-related idiom to help you move on and forget your past mistakes.

In that case you can say, “Don’t cry over spilt milk.”

Well, you broke my heart (broke my heart),

When you said ‘goodbye’ (said goodbye)

But now the milk’s been spilt and you’re going to cry.

Early in the morning, you’re going to know that I was right...oh yeah...

When we “cry over spilt milk,” we are upset or sad about something bad we have done that cannot be undone⁸. This is another way of saying, “What’s done is done. You cannot change the past. So stop thinking about it.” If you spill milk, you cannot gather it back up and put it back in the container.

We usually use the expression this way: “There's no use crying over spilled milk.” “Spilled” or “spilt” are both okay. Some say, this expression was first used in the mid-1600s in England. Back then, the expression was “no weeping for shed milk.”

If old quotes and food expressions are still not working for you, there are other ways to state this idea.

Let’s say past regrets continue to trouble your boss. You can use a word we heard earlier – dwell. You might tell your boss: “Don’t dwell on the past. You cannot change it, so why worry about it? You must move on and look toward the future.”

This is all very polite. And the word “dwell” works well here as it is somewhat formal. It’s good for a pep talk with your boss.

But what if one of your close friends is having the same kind of problem? What if this friend has been stuck in the past for far too long? They need a very different type of pep talk. It may be time for you to tell your friend, “Get over it!”

Now, this could sound rude. After all, it is a wake-up call, a warning to change for the better. And those can be hard for people to hear and accept. But if someone has been crying over spilt milk for months, or even years, a wake-up call is necessary.

And that’s the end of this Words and Their Stories. Until next time, I’m Anna Matteo.

You cry over spilled milk.

You keep your tears in a jar.

You think the world is going to end tomorrow.

Ain't it beautiful how different we are...

Words in This Story

regret – v. to feel sad or sorry about (something that you did or did not do)

quote – n. something that a person says or writes that is repeated or used by someone else in another piece of writing or a speech

distraction – n. an object that directs one's attention away from something else

idiom – n. an expression that cannot be understood from the meanings of its separate words but that has a separate meaning of its own

polite – adj. having or showing good manners or respect for other people : socially correct or proper

formal – adj. requiring proper clothing and manners

pep talk – n. a usually brief, intense, and emotional talk designed to influence or encourage someone

rude – adj. not having or showing concern or respect for the rights and feelings of other people : not polite

wake-up call – n. something that serves to alert a person to a problem, danger, or need

1 influential   

adj.有影响的，有权势的

参考例句：

• He always tries to get in with the most influential people.他总是试图巴结最有影响的人物。
• He is a very influential man in the government.他在政府中是个很有影响的人物。

2 blunders   

（因无知、粗心等造成）的错误( blunder的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• At the examination he made several glaring blunders,and that did for him. 他在考试中出了几个大错，这下就完了。
• If (one was) overwhelmed by passion, it could lead to serious blunders. 当感情完全淹没理智时，就可能铸成大错。

3 absurdities   

n.极端无理性( absurdity的名词复数 )；荒谬；谬论；荒谬的行为

参考例句：

• She has a sharp eye for social absurdities, and compassion for the victims of social change. 她独具慧眼，能够看到社会上荒唐的事情，对于社会变革的受害者寄以同情。 来自辞典例句
• The absurdities he uttered at the dinner party landed his wife in an awkward situation. 他在宴会上讲的荒唐话使他太太陷入窘境。 来自辞典例句

4 serenely   

adv.安详地，宁静地，平静地

参考例句：

• The boat sailed serenely on towards the horizon.小船平稳地向着天水交接处驶去。
• It was a serenely beautiful night.那是一个宁静美丽的夜晚。

5 encumbered   

v.妨碍，阻碍，拖累( encumber的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• The police operation was encumbered by crowds of reporters. 警方的行动被成群的记者所妨碍。
• The narrow quay was encumbered by hundreds of carts. 狭窄的码头被数百辆手推车堵得水泄不通。 来自辞典例句

6 dwell   

vi.老是想着，详细讲述

参考例句：

• Sometimes his mind would dwell on the horrors he had been through.有时他会老是想着他所经历过的种种恐怖。
• A great number of water fowls dwell on the island.许多水鸟在岛上栖息。

7 distraction   

n.精神涣散，精神不集中，消遣，娱乐

参考例句：

• Total concentration is required with no distractions.要全神贯注，不能有丝毫分神。
• Their national distraction is going to the disco.他们的全民消遣就是去蹦迪。

8 undone   

a.未做完的，未完成的

参考例句：

• He left nothing undone that needed attention.所有需要注意的事他都注意到了。