Introduction
A proper quarterlife crisis involves a certain amountof disillusionment, ennui, boredom, fear, anxiety, andgrowing pains. But those terrifying soundingemotions are the ones that get all the press—howabout giving that “growing” some props for once?
Sure you’re in that weird nebulous post-adolescentpre-total-grownuphood other-space of life where youdon’t quite have it together (or at least don’t feel likeyou do), but if you take a hard look at your life, thereare at least a few things that you’ve probably figuredout by now.
You Know What Friendship Is
In high school or college, friendship was mostly a matter of geography—who you had classes with or wholived down the hall or joined the same club. Out in the real world for a while, you’ve learned that realfriendship is made of tougher and—and dare we say it—better stuff. (Although just wait until you’re in yourthirties and everyone’s getting married and having kids…that’s when the real test comes.)
Dating "Bad Boys" Just Isn't Worth It
All those hours you fretted about your major and wondering if it was marketable enough, if your GPA washigh enough, and if your extracurriculars were impressive enough…and now you know that most employersjust want to see that you’ve completed something. Who cares if it’s a degree in drama or basket-weaving orP.E1.? Nobody cares about the particulars of what you did in college, only that you went and finished.
Jagermeister Tastes Awful
It’s a fact. You’ll wonder how you ever could have ingested that inky black licorice swill voluntarily.
Sunscreen Is Important
Right around age twenty-five, you start to be able to tell who wears sunscreen and who’s a sun-worshipper—the sunscreeners still have dewy, youthful skin, while the tanners have the beginnings ofcrows-feet and brown spots. Which group do you want to be in?
You Don't Know Everything
Ever heard that saying, “A little knowledge is a dangerous thing.” College makes you feel like you’ve got itall figured out, and that blinds you to the truth—which is that you know so little, you can’t even comprehendhow little you know. Luckily, the real world is quite handy at disabusing you of the notion that you’re atwenty-two-year-old font of wisdom. At work, in relationships… the more experience you get, the more yourealize how much more you still have to learn. This never stops
You Can’t Pull Off Every Trend
Skinny jeans, thigh-high boots, hippie headbands, crop tops—you can’t win ‘em all. You’ve learned whichones work and that it’s okay to abstain from the ones that don’t.
Living with Five Roommates Is Terrible
It isn’t one totally awesome continuous bohemian girl-power slumber party estrofest. It’s just a pain in theass. You’ve resolved that you’ll share your next apartment with only one other roommate and onedishwasher.
Your Degree is Meaningless
All those hours you fretted about your major and wondering if it was marketable enough, if your GPA washigh enough, and if your extracurriculars were impressive enough…and now you know that most employersjust want to see that you’ve completed something. Who cares if it’s a degree in drama or basket-weaving orP.E.? Nobody cares about the particulars of what you did in college, only that you went and finished.
Everyone Compromises
So you thought you’d be the lone she-wolf individualist who forged her own trail and never lowered herstandards? You thought you’d ride the powerful wave of your idealism into a job where you’d change theworld and find glory, all while carving out a perfect family life, because surely those older women and theirtalks of “work-life balance” didn’t apply to you. You were different, you were better. Or so you thought.
Sometimes you have to take a job because you need health insurance. Sometimes you make the sensible,safe decision instead of the one that you’re passionate about. Sometimes you make allowances in yourrighteous ideology to account for the fact that quite often, life is just about getting through the day.Congratulations—you’re human.
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