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英文笑话

   幽默笑话,像一朵划破暗夜的礼花,为你带来愉悦的同时,让整个身心得到彻底的放松。幽默能使你忘记痛苦。懂得幽默,压力就会减少;笑口常开,身体就更加健康。
   《英文笑话》从实用的角度入手选择的这些英语笑话 ,体现了英语国家的风俗民情和文化韵味,充满时代气息、能开阔读者的眼界,具有实用性和趣味性,便于读者学习

 

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  • 英文笑话:Give Me a Dollar 给我一块钱

    Son: Dad, give me a dime. Father: Son, don't you think you're getting too big to be forever begging for dimes? Son: I guess you're right, Dad. Give me a dollar, will you? 儿子:爸爸,给我一角钱。 父亲:儿子,你不认为你已经长大了,不该再老是一角一角...

  • 英文笑话:The Result of Laziness 懒惰的结果

    Mother: Why were you kept after school today, Johnny? Johnny: Teacher told us to write an essay on The Result of Laziness, and I turned in a blank sheet of paper. 妈妈:约翰尼,你今天放学以后为什么被留下了? 约翰尼:老师叫我们写一篇题为懒惰的结果的...

  • 英文笑话:Clever Bobby 聪明的博比

    Brown was very proud of his young son. Once he was talking to a visitor, telling the man how clever his son was. The boy is only two years old, he said, and knows all animals. He's going to be a great naturalist. Here, let me show you. He took a boo...

  • 英文笑话:Stupid Orders 愚蠢的命令

    When Nasreddin was a boy, he never did what he was told, so his father always told him to do the opposite of what he wanted him to do. One day, when the two were bringing sacks of flour home on their donkeys, they had to cross a shallow river. When...

  • 英文笑话:A Pledge 誓约

    Grandpa was celebrating his 100th birthday, and everyone was complimenting him on how well he looked. I'll tell you the secret, he said. My wife and I were married seventy-five years ago. On our wedding night we made a pledge that whenever we had a...

  • 英文笑话:To Patch the Hole 补洞

    A young man came home from work and found his bride upset. I feel terrible, she said. I was pressing your suit and I burned a big hole in the seat of your trousers. Forget it, consoled her husband. Remember that I've got an extra pair of pants for t...

  • 英文笑话:I Didn't Notice It 我没看到它

    Mother: I left two pieces of cake in the cupboard this morning, Johnny, and now there is only one piece left. Can you explain that? Johnny: Well, I suppose it was so dark that I didn't notice the other. 妈妈:约翰尼,我今天早上在橱子里放了两块点心。...

  • 英文笑话:Ear Short 耳聋

    I thought my wife, Barbara, was losing her hearing, so one day I decided to test it. I quietly walked in the front door and stood 30 feet behind her, Barbara, I said, can you hear me? There was no response, so I moved to 20 feet behind her behind he...

  • 英文笑话:Relative By Marriage 婆家的亲戚

    A husband and wife drove for miles in silence after a terrible argument in which neither would budge. The husband pointed to a mule in a pasture. Relative of yours? he asked. Yes, she replied. By marriage. 一对夫妻开着车出去,走了很长一段时间谁也不...

  • 英文笑话:Somebody 人物

    First man: In my house I'm really somebody. Second man: Is that so? First man: Yes. Every night my wife calls out from the kitchen, Will somebody take out the garbage? 第一位男人:我在家里确实是一个人物。 第二位男人:真是这样吗? 第一位男人:是的,...

  • 英文笑话:Improvement 进步

    One student to another: How are your English lessons coming along? Fine. I used to be the one who couldn't understand Englishmen, and now it's Englishmen who can't understand me. 一位学生对另一位说:你的英语最近学的怎么样了? 很好,我过去不懂英国人...

  • 英文笑话:He Swore to Die 他发誓要死

    If you refuse to marry me, he swore, I shall die. She refused him. He died sixty years later. 你如果拒绝和我结婚,他发誓说,我就要死。她拒绝了他。六十年以后,他死了。...

  • 英文笑话:My Sister's Fingers 我妹妹的手指头

    Teacher: Kevin, why are you late this time. Kevin: Please sir, I bruised two fingers knocking in a nail at home. Teacher: I don't see any bandages. Kevin: Oh, they weren't mine. I told my little sister to hold the nail. 老师:凯温,这次你怎么又迟到...

  • 英文笑话:The Plural Form of "Child" “孩子”的复数形式

    Teacher: What is the plural of Man, Tom? Tom: Men. Teacher: Good. And the plural of child? Tom: Twins. 老师:汤姆,男人这个词的复数形式是什么? 汤姆:男人们。 老师:答得好。那孩子的复数形式呢? 汤姆:双胞胎。...

  • 英文笑话:4-4=? 四减四等于几?

    One day, the teacher inquired Peter: How much is four minus four? Peter was tongue-tied. The teacher got angry and said: What a fool! You see, if I put four coins in your pocket, but there is a hole in your pocket and all of them leak out, now what...

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