【英语语言学习】你是哪种父母？

RACHEL MARTIN, HOST:

Now to the debate about so-called free range parenting. This whole concept drew a lot of attention recently after a couple in Maryland let their two kids, aged¹ 10 and 6, walk one mile on their own from a local park back to their house. A concerned neighbor saw the kids and called the police. And suddenly those parents, Danielle and Alexander Meitiv, were under investigation² for neglect. The family has been vocal³ about their choice to give their kids more freedom. We reached out to two women who blog about parenting issues, Katie Arnold of Santa Fe, New Mexico and Denene Millner of Atlanta, Georgia. I started by asking them what they thought about this particular case. Katie Arnold said she appreciates what Danielle Meitiv was doing by letting her kids out on their own.

KATIE ARNOLD: I liked her idea of sort of their radius⁴ was going out. You know? Let's try this very close to home. Let's go a little farther. And I thought she had a very measured, practical approach.

MARTIN: Denene, how did you see this?

DENENE MILLNER: I thought that it was a bit much to let a 6-year-old and a 10-year-old walk a mile and play in the park for an hour by themselves without an adult. I have three children. And it took me years to trust that other people wouldn't bother my children, even with something as simple as getting off of the bus and coming down the street without me. It's not about kids to me. It's about the outside world and what the possibilities are.

MARTIN: So you're not saying, no, you shouldn't teach your kids how to be independent, but there are just too many external factors that you just can't account for?

MILLNER: Absolutely. My daughters are 12 and 15. And we live across the street in Atlanta from Piedmont Park. And I don't let them go to the park by themselves. They can, once we're in the park, go off and ride their bicycles for a period of time without me being on their heels. But I live in the epicenter of a big urban city.

MARTIN: I mean, this - you do have to consider the environment. Katie, how do you think about that?

ARNOLD: Yeah, certainly. My two daughters are 4 and 6. So we're not at that stage where I'm comfortable at all leaving them in a park and having them walk home. I certainly would like to think that that is possible as they grow up. We also live in Santa Fe. You know, we know many people. I grew up in a town in New Jersey⁵ with, you know, a suburb. We had free range. And I think that's where I'm coming from as a mother, wanting to give my children the same freedoms that I had, but acknowledging⁶ that it's a different landscape we live in.

MARTIN: So what's changed, do you think, Katie? Can you give me an example of something you perhaps got to do that your kids couldn't now?

ARNOLD: I think our neighborhoods have changed. I think maybe we've dispersed⁷ more. The neighborhood I grew up, there was a kind of protective posse of kids, if you will. And there's some safety in that.

MILLNER: I grew up in Long Island, New York. And our neighbors looked out for the kids. Now the neighbors call the cops on your kids.

MARTIN: Although you can argue that both of those attitudes come from a place of concern - right? - like, the community spirit involved in taking care of everyone's kids. And at the same time, it's an anomaly to see young kids walking around having this kind of freedom that that, in turn, creates a situation where people are more concerned. And it's a red flag.

MILLNER: I think it's disingenuous⁸ for people to think that children are no longer latchkey kids. There are plenty of kids whose parents work during the day, and who can't be there with their kids who may have to walk home from school and may be a little younger than we want them to be.

There is the one example the woman out in South Carolina who was actually arrested because she was at work at McDonald's and didn't have child care for her 9-year-old. So her 9-year-old was out playing in the park. Someone called the cops and said this child is playing by herself. And that mother got arrested and charged and had her child taken away from her. So it's one thing to talk about this sort of my kid is a free range kid, and I want my child to have independence. But I think we can't forget the fact that there are plenty of parents out there who really have no other choice.

MARTIN: Free range isn't just a philosophy. It's a reality.

MILLNER: Absolutely, it's a reality.

MARTIN: Katie, let me ask you, are there - have you made a decision that you, in retrospect⁹, perhaps regret or wish you had handled differently? Have you let your kids too far afield at any point?

ARNOLD: I take my daughter skiing, my older daughter. And, you know, there was one moment when we were skiing, and she wanted to zigzag¹⁰ through the trees. And I'm just sort of watching her, you know, from behind yelling¹¹ "slow down." And there's that moment when you realize, you know, you're just going to always be a little bit behind them yelling "slow down." And that's kind of what childhood and growing up is about.

MARTIN: Denene, can you give me an example of a moment that represents a gray area for you in your decision-making? Perhaps a situation where you were really involved or keeping your kids really close, and perhaps you could have given them a little more freedom?

MILLNER: I think my daughter, my 15-year-old, who is about to be 16, is in this sort of sweet 16 party, you know, part of her life now. May think that I'm a little too hands-on. Her father and I have had to back off just a little bit and allow her to go out and be social with her friends without the watchful¹² eye of her parents. And this is new for us. So we have eased up a little bit, but I don't allow house parties because I don't, again, trust other people.

MARTIN: Any closing thoughts from either of you on this?

ARNOLD: Yeah. It's interesting, Denene, to hear you speak about your children who are older and, you know, my girls are quite a few years away from that. But I really appreciate what you're saying because I anticipate that socially I'm going to be a little bit stricter than I am in the outdoor world. I mean, we were given great liberties in the fresh air. You know, but my parents were quite strict. Again, what you were saying about house parties. Forget it, no way, you know, nothing out on a school night. And I think we go with, in many cases, with what we know and what we knew as children. And that shapes us so much as parents.

MARTIN: Katie Arnold is a freelance journalist. She writes a blog on raising adventurous¹³ kids for Outside Magazine. She talked to us from Santa Fe, New Mexico. Denene Millner is a freelance journalist who writes a parenting blog called My Brown Baby. She joined us from Atlanta, Georgia. Thanks to both of you.

ARNOLD: That was great, thank you.

MILLNER: Thank you for having us.

1 aged   

adj.年老的，陈年的

参考例句：

• He had put on weight and aged a little.他胖了，也老点了。
• He is aged,but his memory is still good.他已年老，然而记忆力还好。

2 investigation   

n.调查，调查研究

参考例句：

• In an investigation,a new fact became known, which told against him.在调查中新发现了一件对他不利的事实。
• He drew the conclusion by building on his own investigation.他根据自己的调查研究作出结论。

3 vocal   

adj.直言不讳的；嗓音的；n.[pl.]声乐节目

参考例句：

• The tongue is a vocal organ.舌头是一个发音器官。
• Public opinion at last became vocal.终于舆论哗然。

4 radius   

n.半径，半径范围；有效航程，范围，界限

参考例句：

• He has visited every shop within a radius of two miles.周围两英里以内的店铺他都去过。
• We are measuring the radius of the circle.我们正在测量圆的半径。

5 jersey   

n.运动衫

参考例句：

• He wears a cotton jersey when he plays football.他穿运动衫踢足球。
• They were dressed alike in blue jersey and knickers.他们穿着一致，都是蓝色的运动衫和灯笼短裤。

6 acknowledging   

v.承认( acknowledge的现在分词 )；鸣谢；对…打招呼；告知已收到

参考例句：

• That would be acknowledging the Railroad's ownership right away-forfeiting their rights for good. 这一来不是就等于干脆承认铁路公司的所有权-永久放弃他们自己的主权吗？ 来自辞典例句
• It is a great relief to allow us ourselves the luxury of acknowledging our human frailties. 让我们自己享受承认人类的弱点的快乐是一大慰藉。 来自辞典例句

7 dispersed   

adj. 被驱散的, 被分散的, 散布的

参考例句：

• The clouds dispersed themselves. 云散了。
• After school the children dispersed to their homes. 放学后，孩子们四散回家了。

8 disingenuous   

adj.不诚恳的，虚伪的

参考例句：

• It is disingenuous of him to flatter me.他对我阿谀奉承，是居心叵测。
• His brother Shura with staring disingenuous eyes was plotting to master the world.他那长着一对狡诈眼睛的哥哥瑞拉，处心积虑图谋征服整个世界。

9 retrospect   

n.回顾，追溯；v.回顾，回想，追溯

参考例句：

• One's school life seems happier in retrospect than in reality.学校生活回忆起来显得比实际上要快乐。
• In retrospect,it's easy to see why we were wrong.回顾过去就很容易明白我们的错处了。

10 zigzag   

n.曲折，之字形；adj.曲折的，锯齿形的；adv.曲折地，成锯齿形地；vt.使曲折；vi.曲折前行

参考例句：

• The lightning made a zigzag in the sky.闪电在天空划出一道Z字形。
• The path runs zigzag up the hill.小径向山顶蜿蜒盘旋。

11 yelling   

v.叫喊，号叫，叫着说( yell的现在分词 )

参考例句：

• The coach stood on the sidelines yelling instructions to the players. 教练站在场外，大声指挥运动员。
• He let off steam by yelling at a clerk. 他对一个职员大喊大叫，借以发泄怒气。 来自《简明英汉词典》

12 watchful   

adj.注意的，警惕的

参考例句：

• The children played under the watchful eye of their father.孩子们在父亲的小心照看下玩耍。
• It is important that health organizations remain watchful.卫生组织保持警惕是极为重要的。

13 adventurous   

adj.爱冒险的；惊心动魄的，惊险的，刺激的　

参考例句：

• I was filled with envy at their adventurous lifestyle.我很羨慕他们敢于冒险的生活方式。
• He was predestined to lead an adventurous life.他注定要过冒险的生活。