婚姻:逃不了的围城

 　　On TV, in film, and in "Save the Date" cards tacked¹ to fridges everywhere, we are steeped in the cultural white noise of wedding voyeurism² and schadenfreude. A new study threatens to change the conversation: The number of married Americans is at a record low. The Pew Research Center has crunched³ the Census⁴ data and discovered that only 51 percent of adults are married. That number plunges⁵ to 20 percent for 18-to-29-year-olds. In 2010, weddings dropped by 5 percent from the previous year.

　　电视里，电影里，各家各户冰箱上贴着的“婚礼日期提醒卡”(婚礼请柬)上，我们摆脱不了某种文化白噪音——我们曝露在窥探他人私密的八卦人群之间，我们浸透在幸灾乐祸的看客之中。而最近的一项调查却转变了我们的话题：美国结婚人数创历史最低纪录。美国调查机构皮尤研究中心对人口普查资料进行了分析，发现美国只有51%的成年夫妇已婚，其中18-29岁的青年中已婚人数比例跌至20%。2010年，结婚人数比2009年降低了5%。

　　This study is just the latest one to track a broadening of relationship choices for the youngest generation. Cohabitation is on the rise. Last year's Pew research on marriage unearths⁶ the ambivalence⁷ behind the numbers: 44 percent of Millennials feel that marriage is "becoming obsolete⁸." So is marriage on its way out?

　　青年人的婚恋关系选择面在不断拓宽，这次即是对最年轻的一代进行的跟踪调查。我们发现，年轻人同居的现象日益增多。去年皮尤研究中心对婚姻的研究揭露了隐藏在数字背后的矛盾心态：44%的新千年一代认为婚姻“越来越过时了”。那么婚姻真的过时了吗？

　　Hardly. Scholars and sociologists say that younger generations are probably delaying marriage, but that doesn't mean we won't eventually tie the knot. "The age of marriage has reached an all-time high," says the Council on Contemporary Families' director of research, Stephanie Coontz—26.5 for brides, 28.7 for grooms⁹. Some people may stay single forever. But Coontz warns that the number won't be as dramatic as we might think. "My guess would be that a slightly lower, but still fairly high amount of people will get married in their lifetimes—say, 84 percent as opposed to 90 percent a few years ago, or the 95 percent abberration in the 1950s."

　　不尽然。一些学者与社会学家表示，年轻一代很可能在延迟结婚，但并不意味永远不结婚。“平均结婚年龄已经创下空前最高纪录——新娘26.5岁，新郎28.7岁。”当代家庭协会的研究主任斯蒂芬妮·昆兹这样说道。还有一些人可能永远保持单身。但昆兹提醒我们，这个人数不会像我们想象的那么多。“我猜想，虽然结婚人数可能会减少，但依然有相当多的人会在一生中选择结婚——相对于几年前成年人中已婚人数为90%，目前则只有85%，早而在上个世纪50年代，这个比例是95%。”

　　Indeed, a majority of singles are hoping to walk down an aisle¹⁰ one day—even those in cohabiting couples—regardless of marriage's obsolescence¹¹. Therein lies the paradox¹²: Why do we want to join an institution that, according to us, is passing its expiration¹³ date? Privately¹⁴, we're choosing to live in sin or by our lonesomes. But publicly, we profess¹⁵ our interest in joining the oldest of romantic institutions. Or is it the other way around?

　　事实上，大多数单身贵族还是很希望有一天——可以像其他同居男女一样——走在林荫道上——先不考虑婚姻的。其中存在一个悖论：为什么我们都想遵循，在我们看来，是一种即将过时的制度呢？背地里，我们选择罪恶地姘居或过着独居生活；却公开宣称自己对加入那种最过时 但具有浪漫情调的制度多么有兴趣。或者又多么没兴趣？

　　Here's one possibility: The word "marriage" means different things in different contexts. On a societal level, marriage dredges up images of antiquated¹⁶ gender¹⁷ roles, social pressures, and institutional control. But individually, we see the opportunity to mold the institution to fit our own values—even more now that it's not obligatory¹⁸.

　　这里有一种可能的解释：“婚姻”这个词在不同的语境中意义不同。在社会层面上，婚姻让人想起那种过时的性别角色形象、社会压力以及制度上的约束。但个人看来，我们有机会改进这种制度让其符合我们的价值观——更多是因为婚姻不是强制的。

　　"As marriage has become less necessary to support yourself, to gain respectability, to have a rewarding life and a successful life, we've raised our expectations of what kind of a relationship we want," says Coontz. "Because it's not essential, we're no longer willing to enter a marriage that we don't see as being really, really good."

　　“我们能够自力更生、获取社会地位、过上有意义而又成功的生活，在这个过程中，婚姻变得越来越不必要，我们对自己想要的那种婚恋关系的期望值抬高了，”昆兹表示，“因为婚姻不重要了，我们不再心甘情愿地踏入我们认为真的真的那么好的婚姻殿堂了。”

　　That logic¹⁹ may mean that our generation waits to get hitched²⁰ for the "right" reasons—love, compatibility, financial stability (which, given the state of the economy, is inevitably²¹ delayed). That explains the rise of cohabitation as much as it does the fall of marriage. Most of us who choose to live together see it as a test drive for marriage, not a real alternative. But because we recognize that we do have options, marriage seems more "ours."

　　那样的逻辑可能意味着，我们这一代就是在等“对”的结婚理由——爱情、合得来以及经济基础稳定（考虑到经济状况，结婚就不可避免地延迟了。）这也很容易解释随着结婚人数的下降，同居人数却在上升。多数选择生活在一起的人都将同居看做“试婚”，而不是一个婚姻备选项。但原因是我们认识到了自己有选择权，这样看来，婚姻更是“我们自己的事儿”。

　　By agreeing that marriage is "obsolete," we're saying good riddance to our parents' idea of what the word means. But so many of us feel this way that we have created a new social compact around the institution's redefinition. We're signing the certificates on the premise²² that we're ambivalent²³ about marriage but too chicken to start from scratch. Pretty soon our friends will pair up and fall in line. And so it begins again.

　　我们赞同婚姻“过时”这种说法，就已经摆脱了父母眼中这个词的概念，这的确可喜可贺。许多人都有这种感觉，感觉自己已经围着这个制度的再定义创造了一种新的社会契约。在婚书上签字的那一刻，心中依然充满矛盾、胆怯，没有白手起家的勇气。但是很快，我们的朋友们就成双成对地加入结婚大军。那么结婚就又流行了。

1 tacked   

用平头钉钉( tack的过去式和过去分词 )； 附加，增补； 帆船抢风行驶，用粗线脚缝

参考例句：

• He tacked the sheets of paper on as carefully as possible. 他尽量小心地把纸张钉上去。
• The seamstress tacked the two pieces of cloth. 女裁缝把那两块布粗缝了起来。

2 voyeurism   

n.窥阴癖者

参考例句：

• Portraiture merges here with voyeurism and surveillance. 肖像拍摄中夹杂着偷窥和监视。 来自互联网
• And while Wife Swap was pure voyeurism, Boss Swap hints at some real issues. 《换妻》纯粹反映了一种偷窥心理，而《互换老板》则影射了一些真实的问题。 来自互联网

3 crunched   

v.嘎吱嘎吱地咬嚼( crunch的过去式和过去分词 )；嘎吱作响；（快速大量地）处理信息；数字捣弄

参考例句：

• Our feet crunched on the frozen snow. 我们的脚嘎吱嘎吱地踩在冻雪上。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• He closed his jaws on the bones and crunched. 他咬紧骨头，使劲地嚼。 来自英汉文学 - 热爱生命

4 census   

n.(官方的)人口调查，人口普查

参考例句：

• A census of population is taken every ten years.人口普查每10年进行一次。
• The census is taken one time every four years in our country.我国每四年一次人口普查。

5 plunges   

n.跳进，投入vt.使投入，使插入，使陷入vi.投入，跳进，陷入v.颠簸( plunge的第三人称单数 )；暴跌；骤降；突降

参考例句：

• Even before he plunges into his program, he has his audience in his pocket. 他的节目甚至还没有出场，就已控制住了观众。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• 'Monseigneur, he precipitated himself over the hill-side, head first, as a person plunges into the river.' “大人，他头冲下跳下山坡去了，像往河里跳一样。” 来自英汉文学 - 双城记

6 unearths   

发掘或挖出某物( unearth的第三人称单数 )； 搜寻到某事物，发现并披露

参考例句：

7 ambivalence   

n.矛盾心理

参考例句：

• She viewed her daughter's education with ambivalence.她看待女儿的教育问题态度矛盾。
• She felt a certain ambivalence towards him.她对他的态度有些矛盾。

8 obsolete   

adj.已废弃的，过时的

参考例句：

• These goods are obsolete and will not fetch much on the market.这些货品过时了，在市场上卖不了高价。
• They tried to hammer obsolete ideas into the young people's heads.他们竭力把陈旧思想灌输给青年。

9 grooms   

n.新郎( groom的名词复数 )；马夫v.照料或梳洗（马等）( groom的第三人称单数 )；使做好准备；训练；（给动物）擦洗

参考例句：

• Plender end Wilcox became joint grooms of the chambers. 普伦德和威尔科克斯成为共同的贴身侍从。 来自辞典例句
• Egypt: Families, rather than grooms, propose to the bride. 埃及：在埃及，由新郎的家人，而不是新郎本人，向新娘求婚。 来自互联网

10 aisle   

n.（教堂、教室、戏院等里的）过道，通道

参考例句：

• The aisle was crammed with people.过道上挤满了人。
• The girl ushered me along the aisle to my seat.引座小姐带领我沿着通道到我的座位上去。

11 obsolescence   

n.过时，陈旧，废弃

参考例句：

• For some small unproductive mills,the reality is not merger but obsolescence and bankruptcy.对一些效率低下的小厂而言，现实不是合并，而是可能被淘汰和破产。
• Finally,the cost approach can provide a basis for allocating penalties,specifically economic obsolescence.最后，成本法可作为一个分配因陈旧特别是因经济

12 paradox   

n.似乎矛盾却正确的说法；自相矛盾的人(物)

参考例句：

• The story contains many levels of paradox.这个故事存在多重悖论。
• The paradox is that Japan does need serious education reform.矛盾的地方是日本确实需要教育改革。

13 expiration   

n.终结，期满，呼气，呼出物

参考例句：

• Can I have your credit card number followed by the expiration date?能告诉我你的信用卡号码和它的到期日吗?
• This contract shall be terminated on the expiration date.劳动合同期满，即行终止。

14 privately   

adv.以私人的身份，悄悄地，私下地

参考例句：

• Some ministers admit privately that unemployment could continue to rise.一些部长私下承认失业率可能继续升高。
• The man privately admits that his motive is profits.那人私下承认他的动机是为了牟利。

15 profess   

v.声称，冒称，以...为业，正式接受入教，表明信仰

参考例句：

• I profess that I was surprised at the news.我承认这消息使我惊讶。
• What religion does he profess?他信仰哪种宗教？

16 antiquated   

adj.陈旧的，过时的

参考例句：

• Many factories are so antiquated they are not worth saving.很多工厂过于陈旧落后，已不值得挽救。
• A train of antiquated coaches was waiting for us at the siding.一列陈旧的火车在侧线上等着我们。

17 gender   

n.（生理上的）性，（名词、代词等的）性

参考例句：

• French differs from English in having gender for all nouns.法语不同于英语，所有的名词都有性。
• Women are sometimes denied opportunities solely because of their gender.妇女有时仅仅因为性别而无法获得种种机会。

18 obligatory   

adj.强制性的，义务的，必须的

参考例句：

• It is obligatory for us to obey the laws.我们必须守法。
• It is obligatory on every citizen to safeguard our great motherland.保卫我们伟大的祖国是每一个公民应尽的义务。

19 logic   

n.逻辑(学)；逻辑性

参考例句：

• What sort of logic is that?这是什么逻辑？
• I don't follow the logic of your argument.我不明白你的论点逻辑性何在。

20 hitched   

（免费）搭乘他人之车( hitch的过去式和过去分词 )； 搭便车； 攀上； 跃上

参考例句：

• They hitched a ride in a truck. 他们搭乘了一辆路过的货车。
• We hitched a ride in a truck yesterday. 我们昨天顺便搭乘了一辆卡车。

21 inevitably   

adv.不可避免地；必然发生地

参考例句：

• In the way you go on,you are inevitably coming apart.照你们这样下去，毫无疑问是会散伙的。
• Technological changes will inevitably lead to unemployment.技术变革必然会导致失业。

22 premise   

n.前提；v.提论，预述

参考例句：

• Let me premise my argument with a bit of history.让我引述一些史实作为我立论的前提。
• We can deduce a conclusion from the premise.我们可以从这个前提推出结论。

23 ambivalent   

adj.含糊不定的；(态度等)矛盾的

参考例句：

• She remained ambivalent about her marriage.她对于自己的婚事仍然拿不定主意。
• Although she professed fear of the Russians,she seemed to have ambivalent feelings toward Philby himself.虽然她承认害怕俄国人，然而她似乎对菲尔比本人有一种矛盾的感情。