英美文化：英美人这样说只是客气而已！

 　　In sociolinguistics and conversation analysis (CA), politeness strategies are speech acts that express concern for others and minimize threats to self-esteem ("face") in particular social contexts.

　　在社会语言学角度与会话分析角度下，礼貌策略指的是一种在特定社会背景下表达对他人的感受且将威胁自尊(面子)降低至最小程度的说话方式。

　　Positive politeness strategies are intended to avoid giving offense¹ by highlighting friendliness². These strategies include juxtaposing criticism with compliments, establishing common ground, and using jokes, nicknames, honorifics, tag questions, special discourse³ markers (please), and in-group jargon⁴ and slang.

　　积极礼貌策略旨在强调友善以避免冒犯，其中包括：扬抑并举、建立共同点、笑话、昵称、敬语、附加疑问句、特殊话语标记(如：请)、圈内行话等。

　　Negative politeness strategies are intended to avoid giving offense by showing deference⁵. These strategies include questioning, hedging, and presenting disagreements as opinions.

　　消极礼貌策略旨在表示尊敬以避免冒犯，其中包括：询问、说话留余地、用提议的方式表示反对。

　　Examples and Observations

　　举例与评析

　　“Shut up!” is rude, even ruder than “Keep quiet!” In the polite version, “Do you think you would mind keeping quiet: this is, after all, a library, and other people are trying to concentrate,” everything in italics is extra. It is there to soften⁶ the demand, giving an impersonal⁷ reason for the request, and avoiding the brutally⁸ direct by the taking of trouble.

　　“闭嘴”这种说法很粗鲁，甚至比“保持肃静”还粗鲁。用礼貌的话来说，应该是“你介意保持安静吗?毕竟这里是图书馆，大家都是来这里专心学习的。”斜体的部分都是多余的。句中的斜体词都是为了缓和语气之用，给出一个非个人的原因，避免产生麻烦。

　　再让我们多看一些例子

　　"Professor, I was wondering if you could tell us about the Chamber⁹ of Secrets."

　　“教授，你能多跟我们讲讲《哈利波特与密室》这部电影吗?”

　　"Would you mind stepping aside? I got a purchase to make."

　　“麻烦让一让好吗?我要买这个东西。”

　　"'Sir,' the gentleman asked with a twang in his voice that was unmistakably Southern, 'would it bother you terribly if I joined you?'"

　　“‘先生’，这位男士的声音里带有鼻音，没有猜错的话应该是南方口音，‘我加入你们会给麻烦你们吗?’”

　　"'Laurence,' said Caroline, 'I don't think I'm going to be much help to you. I've had enough holiday-making. I'll stay for a couple of days but I want to get back to London and do some work, actually. Sorryto change my mind but--'”

　　“‘劳伦斯’，凯罗林说，‘我恐怕帮你不了你太多。我的假期已经够长了。我还会再留几天，但是我真的想回伦敦工作了。很抱歉我改变了心意，但是……’”

　　总结一下上文几个例子中出现的礼貌委婉用语：

　　1、用来提出建议，可以说：

　　I was wondering if you could...

　　2、用来提出要求，可以说：

　　Do you think you would mind...

　　Would you mind...

　　Would it bother you (terribly/heavily...) to...

　　3、用来推脱，可以说：

　　I don't think...

　　Sorry to...but...

　　4、用来提出不同看法，可以说：

　　I don't think...

1 offense   

n.犯规，违法行为；冒犯，得罪

参考例句：

• I hope you will not take any offense at my words. 对我讲的话请别见怪。
• His words gave great offense to everybody present.他的发言冲犯了在场的所有人。

2 friendliness   

n.友谊，亲切，亲密

参考例句：

• Behind the mask of friendliness,I know he really dislikes me.在友善的面具后面，我知道他其实并不喜欢我。
• His manner was a blend of friendliness and respect.他的态度友善且毕恭毕敬。

3 discourse   

n.论文，演说；谈话；话语；vi.讲述，著述

参考例句：

• We'll discourse on the subject tonight.我们今晚要谈论这个问题。
• He fell into discourse with the customers who were drinking at the counter.他和站在柜台旁的酒客谈了起来。

4 jargon   

n.术语，行话

参考例句：

• They will not hear critics with their horrible jargon.他们不愿意听到评论家们那些可怕的行话。
• It is important not to be overawed by the mathematical jargon.要紧的是不要被数学的术语所吓倒.

5 deference   

n.尊重，顺从；敬意

参考例句：

• Do you treat your parents and teachers with deference?你对父母师长尊敬吗？
• The major defect of their work was deference to authority.他们的主要缺陷是趋从权威。

6 soften   

v.(使)变柔软；(使)变柔和

参考例句：

• Plastics will soften when exposed to heat.塑料适当加热就可以软化。
• This special cream will help to soften up our skin.这种特殊的护肤霜有助于使皮肤变得柔软。

7 impersonal   

adj.无个人感情的，与个人无关的，非人称的

参考例句：

• Even his children found him strangely distant and impersonal.他的孩子们也认为他跟其他人很疏远，没有人情味。
• His manner seemed rather stiff and impersonal.他的态度似乎很生硬冷淡。

8 brutally   

adv.残忍地，野蛮地，冷酷无情地

参考例句：

• The uprising was brutally put down.起义被残酷地镇压下去了。
• A pro-democracy uprising was brutally suppressed.一场争取民主的起义被残酷镇压了。

9 chamber   

n.房间，寝室；会议厅；议院；会所

参考例句：

• For many,the dentist's surgery remains a torture chamber.对许多人来说，牙医的治疗室一直是间受刑室。
• The chamber was ablaze with light.会议厅里灯火辉煌。